My husband and I have only been married 3 months. We talked about everything before we got married and I thought we knew each others needs and desires. But he has since stopped doing anything for me. I'm a SAHM and homeschool my son so let me just say I appreciate how hard he works. I do.
So is it selfish of me to want a kind word every once in awhile? Or flowers or a love note? Is it selfish of me to want kids when he doesn't? (we both said before marriage that we want kids and now he doesn't) Is it selfish of me to want him to act like a dad to not only my son but his kids, and by dad I mean spend time with them, talk to them, teach them things? I don't know what to do. I feel like our marriage is over before its begun. Oh and yes we talked about it and agreed to be the parent for each others kids since his kids don't have a mom and my son doesn't have a dad but now I see that I'm parenting all of them and he's not doing anything. Except on occasional yelling at them for not doing what they're told.
Also is it selfish of me to want someone to talk to? I mean to really talk to, to discuss life with and where we're headed. The future and our goals? DH and I don't do that, in fact he has said expressly that he won't talk about the future. Is it selfish of me to want a companion to go places and see things with? He won't. And I don't know what to do. He fulfills none of my needs and I am sooo unhappy. When I try to talk to him about it he just gets mad and tells me I make him feel like a failure but still does nothing. I've asked him specifically for certain things like hugs and hand holding and don't get those.
Am I being selfish or does my husband really not love me?
Asked by Anonymous at 12:04 PM on Jan. 13, 2013 in Relationships
Sound like he was just telling you all those thing to get you as a live in babysitter to his kids. (You do take care of his kids right?) So you guys did all this talking before marriage and then he just has not kept his promises?
What are you planing to do about it?
Answer by louise2 at 12:11 PM on Jan. 13, 2013
Answer by JennieMarie1103 at 12:20 PM on Jan. 13, 2013
Only 3 months into your marriage & this sudden change? Were there no hints to his behavior beforehand? This sounds very odd. People don't change that much in 3 months. What does he say he wants from you? Maybe he has financial troubles & doesn't want to burden you with them. There has to be something bothering him. OR you were so caught up in getting married that you maybe turned a blind eye to his behavior before the wedding? Is he going through something now?
Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 12:35 PM on Jan. 13, 2013
Answer by tessiedawg at 1:15 PM on Jan. 13, 2013
Answer by dullscissors at 3:49 PM on Jan. 13, 2013
Answer by louise2 at 4:20 PM on Jan. 13, 2013
Answer by hellokittykat at 12:08 AM on Jan. 18, 2013
Answer by hellokittykat at 12:11 AM on Jan. 18, 2013