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where did the romance and sex go?? help please??

i am just so lost. We have a little boy who will be 4 mts tomorrow and i feel bad becuase my husband and i have only been intimate 3 time since i had our son. I just have zero intrest in sex or lovey dovey stuff. I just enjoy being abum when i can and sleeping at night. What is going on? will things be back to normal? i just want the butterflys back and the romance back in our lives. It just feels like i get frustrated with him more often now. I work full time and clean the house everyday and cook dinner everyday and becuase he works night i am with our son every night all night and pretty much am the only one that does everything for him on the weekends, like feeding, changing, playing with. It feels like i have built up anger against my husband and its coming out in the form of killing my sex drive and feeling of romance. Any advice please...... im soo tired of the bickering and fighting over the smallest things.

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Mandijune

Asked by Mandijune at 2:38 PM on Feb. 13, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Its really hard when your child is that young. Its not easy and you are always giving the baby attention and the last thing you want to do is be sexy and have sex. Maybe talk to your hubby. tell him what you are feeling. when i told my hubby that the reason why i was so "standoffish" from him was because I was exhausted with a new baby and housework and in your case you wokr too! Mine got the point and started helping me do ALOT more housework and helping me more with diaper duty and sometimes even getting up with our dd. I think it just took me telling him that stuff.. sometimes men dont get the hint or cant figure out why we are jumping there bones, because we are tired duh! Just sit down with the hubbs and have a talk. Plus since tomorrows Valnetines day you acutally have an excuse to sit down and do something together even if its at home watching a movie. Good Luck! Sorry this is so long.. I totally know where you are comi
    kelsbecca619

    Answer by kelsbecca619 at 2:47 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • ing from!!!
    kelsbecca619

    Answer by kelsbecca619 at 2:47 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • excuse me "arent" jumping their bones.. I should really spell check!
    kelsbecca619

    Answer by kelsbecca619 at 2:48 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • Aw hun my advice is always unconventional so it may not be for you, I'm really only trying to help so if you don't like please just ignore me, as I am no trying to hurt you.

    This happened to me too, I realized when my son was abbout 8 months old that I had post partum depression. And the mear acceptance of the matter was so darn freeing, then I saw a prof. for free (they do that for moms with PPD, you can google it) and I started having sex with my hubby even though I didn't really want to.

    I realized something, that even though I had forced my self to have sex, by the end of it i was sort of enjoying it, and the more sex we had the better it just got.

    Now we have another baby, and our once ago baby is 3yrs old. I jump on my husband every single second he's around. lol

    You'll be okay BUT you have to actually make changes, and try hard, tying seeing a proffesional hun. Good luck and you can PM me if you like.hugs
    Happ-eToBme

    Answer by Happ-eToBme at 3:22 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • Well actually you're not the only one in this situation. I'm a young mom and I feel the same way. Its just after you have a child its different. I dunno if it will go back to normal or not. Especially when your son is still pretty young. Good Luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:37 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • I had the same problem and still sometimes feel like that , But i found having sex even if you don't feel like it make a big difference. So even if you are not in the mood just take the few minutes that the baby gives you and try to be with your husband .
    Hope it will help you
    JAHA68

    Answer by JAHA68 at 4:40 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

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