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Annoying personality?

So...haha. I know It sounds mean, but I've noticed that my 2.5 year old DS can be "annoying" to other kids. He's really sweet and means well but constantly wants to play with other kids when they are around. For example, at the sandbox at the park other day, a little girl was making a sand castle and he kept trying to help. She said she didn't want him and he didn't get it at all! He kept trying and trying, and then finally ended up crying. Today we went to the pool and he wanted to play with this little and he splashed him. The boy got mad and hit him. I told him that the boy didn't like to splash so don't splash him. He stopped, but then came back a few mins later and did it again. And we basically repboy eated the thing over and over again (even with timeouts each time). He always wants kids to do things WITH him. Any suggestions? It makes me almost sad for him :(

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Sarahbeth7

Asked by Sarahbeth7 at 3:53 PM on Jan. 16, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 15 (2,164 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Is he a only child?
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 3:55 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

  • He has a 3 month old sister...so basically right now...yes :) I dfeinitely knowt hat contributes to it, but just want to know how to help him :)
    Sarahbeth7

    Comment by Sarahbeth7 (original poster) at 3:56 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

  • And YES, we are involved in a Monday playgroup, a Wednesday playgroup, and every other Friday we do MOPS. We also have neighbors with kids around his age that he plays with often.
    Sarahbeth7

    Comment by Sarahbeth7 (original poster) at 3:57 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

  • He's 2 1/2... he will learn how to socialize. Right now all he knows is HIM. Give him time. It's totally normal. don't make a big deal out of it though. You don't want to interrupt his learning....
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 4:01 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

  • He is 2 and a half for crying out loud. However with the girl building castles you should have moved him away right after she said no. You should have told him then and they, no leave her play alone for now.

    The splashing thing is a natural thing for kids but you are supposed to be right there and contain him immediately.
    I would not sit back while some kid hit him, I would move to the other area of the pool. With little ones you have to be right there to guide thm.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 4:03 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

  • Aww momma he will get it no worries, he is more aware than other children his age, he doesn't have child company at home, but now he does, wait until he hits his new sibling!
    jerseydiva

    Answer by jerseydiva at 4:04 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

  • Wow Dardenellla.....did ALL of that just didn't want to type it out. The kid he hit was a kid we were ON a playdate with. I am ontop of my chlid at all times, which is why it was so frustrating that he kept going right back over there. I AM there to guide him, and did contain him immediately. It was a kiddie pool and it was small.
    Sarahbeth7

    Comment by Sarahbeth7 (original poster) at 4:09 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

  • And thanks jerseydiva and mavi.!
    Sarahbeth7

    Comment by Sarahbeth7 (original poster) at 4:17 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

  • He's honing his social skills. It's great that he is not ultra shy and wants to play. He just needs a little time to learn to ask them if they want to play together and if they say no, he will eventually learn to accept that and move on to another child.

    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 4:32 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

  • I know what you mean about how he might be perceived, but I don't think "annoying" really expresses what is happening at all. I think it's more that he enjoys being social, at least sometimes, and sometimes the children he's around are occupied, or don't understand his overtures.

    I think it's helpful to intercede in those kinds of public interactions. It helps protect everyone's limits, it helps to protect your son from another child's frustrated aggression, and it can help facilitate, which can transform a situation. (Especially if you can contextualize his behavior AND the other child's behavior, in your simple comments/translation, to create a no-fault zone.) I have twins & this facilitating step is a great help to developing children's empathy for each other, from startlingly young ages. (The best way to learn empathy is by EXPERIENCING it, particularly experiencing acceptance in times when your behavior was challenging.)
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 4:37 PM on Jan. 16, 2013

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