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crazy mil what to do??

Does anyone know if grandparents can legally try to get visitation rights to grandkids? My mother in-law is crazy, my husband and I have cut off contact with her and her family. mental problems run in her part of the family. I am concerned that she might try something to see our daugter and possibly our baby once he is born. also any ideas on what we can do to safe gaurd our kids from her?

 
hypersquirrel

Asked by hypersquirrel at 4:03 PM on Feb. 13, 2009 in Relationships

Level 5 (100 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I think I can help with this one!


    1.What state are you in? The laws regarding "grandparent's rights" vary DRAMATICALLY depending on where you live.


    2.Basically, it comes down to the children. MOST states side with the "in-tact" family--married living independently from parents.


    3.Do your children have a dependent bond with their grandchildren? Have you ever lived with them, used them for regular childcare and/or financial support?


    4.Can you show irrefutable proof that your MIL is CLINICALLY "off?" Not just your word for it!!! LOL


    5.Grandparents generally have to file a court petition in YOUR state of residence, pay court fees and have a hearing before a judge and/or mediator, who will determine the BEST situation for your children. Hope this helps!

    LoriKeet

    Answer by LoriKeet at 4:15 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • i would A. move
    B go to the courts and explain the situation
    C. be nice and play nice
    D stay away from them
    as far as grandparent rights, it depends on teh state you are in
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:05 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • if you got a restraining order againest her, it wouldnt look so good if it did go to the courts.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:06 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • I feel like the grandparents that go to court are of divorced couples but I am not sure. Like if I wouldn't let my ex's parents see my daughter then they could get visitation. I would be sure to document everything like emails, phone calls. Just a simple note on your calendar would be fine and get a journal for situations that require mor info. If she presses the issue later you will have documented reasons as to why she is unfit.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 4:07 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • Grandparents have NO RIGHTS  to their grandkids UNLESS one parent has died, or they are divorced. Granparents think they have "rights" but really they don't - the only people who have "rights" to you kids are you and your DH. Since BOTH you and DH cut contact w/MIL - she's SOL. There isn't much she can do. My MIL is cut off also - so I know that can bring out the "crazy" in anyone!


    Try this group - the women give GREAT advice and most have been in situations like yours!! cafemom.com/group/32665

    Fooph121780

    Answer by Fooph121780 at 4:11 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • I know in Arkansas that grandparents DO NOT have any rights UNLESS the parent of the child is deceased. That is the ONLY right of visitation that they would have to the grandchild..
    honeys_sugamama

    Answer by honeys_sugamama at 4:11 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • I would send her a cease and disist order - thru a lawyer or a notary - so it would be "offiical". If after you send the letter she still contacts you - then go for a restraining order. (this is what we did w/my MIL) IF MIL decides she wants to take you and DH to court for "visitation" the judge will see the C&D letter and that you have an R/O in place - the case would get thrown out and make her head spin faster than she could ever imagine. KEEP EVERYTHING SHE SENDS, LEAVES ETC. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING.
    Fooph121780

    Answer by Fooph121780 at 4:22 PM on Feb. 13, 2009

  • we live in misssouri. We get nothing financially from her nor childcare.(last time I let her watch my 2yr old she let her onto the second story balcony by herself. I happen to come upstairs just as my daughter tried to squeeze through the railings.) unless I could get a psych eval on her I dont know how I would prove it?
    hypersquirrel

    Answer by hypersquirrel at 4:26 PM on Feb. 13, 2009