What would you do if your 4 year old pulled this crap at school?
DD all of the sudden this week at Pre-K decided she was not going to write neatly and was going to pretend she did not know how to do math. He teacher finally told me about it today. As soon as she got home I sat with her and made her write her name 5 times- neatly. We had to erase and start over a few time and I also made her do the math paper she refused to do- and write nicely on- over. Tomorrow she will be copying sentences and Monday (school is out here) she will be doing a few basic math facts to giver her teachers on Tuesday to make up for all the crap she pulled this week. What would you have done?
the one on the left if form school- on the right is the one I made so she could do it over.
at 9:28 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
Level 44 (181,632 Credits)
Well, it seems your daughter is pretty advanced for her age in both math and writing. I don't think I would get mad. At this age there is no consequence for getting wrong answers or writing less neatly than she can, so I'd probably just be wondering why she's pretending to be not as good at this stuff. Maybe she is realizing that she's a little different than the other kids and feels self conscious? They say that girls are generally more concerned about fitting in. I'd really be more interested in whether there is an underlying (and broader problem here), but I wouldn't really care about the quality of her work one week at age 4. There are some kinds of consequences for screwing around in real school.. pre-K doesn't really matter.
at 9:54 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
your FOUR year old does that kind of math?! is she in a private school? not even sure if my almost 6yo in Kindergarten could do all those problems...
As for your behavior question, I have had a few 'backslides' with my dd also and we do make her erase and try again but sometimes it is just her being tired or not feeling well or very distracted. We usually take a break and come back to it, I know that's not very easy for them to do at school but it is worth a try at home... instead of erasing over and over and the kid just getting more and more frustrated :-/
at 9:32 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
Or maybe she feels pressured and figures she can get the teachers at school to leave her alone a bit if she doesn't seem so advanced? I know my son (3 yrs old) doesn't show his teachers at school what he knows because they act like it's a big deal and try to get him to do more and harder stuff, but he just doesn't want to (and I think that's fine). He's more of the kind of kid who likes to figure something out and get comfortable with it without a lot of pressure and attention, so we just give him opportunity and space.
Honestly, I think it would bother me a lot more to think my kid was dumming himself down to fit in... hope it's something else.
at 10:03 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
my dd is in 1st grand and is just now doing this, if my dd was 4 doing this math, i couldn't care if it was wrong
at 10:23 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
Well, I can guarantee my granddaughter (just turned 5) cannot do those problems. She is just now learning to master writing her name.... So, I probably wouldn't have thought anything about it.
at 9:36 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
I would make her go back and redo them. I home school so I don't put up with a lot. I have a 4 yo learning to write in cursive and I have a 6 yo who had to do all her work in cursive. If I can't read it, it is wrong and must be redone so that I can atleast see what your answers are so that I can grade them. My 6 yo has to do an entire page of a number every day b/c her numbers are so atrocious....they look like your DD's numbers and she is 2 years ahead of that in school. I also assign sentences to be written for punishments around here when I want to really ingrain something.
Good Luck with her!!
at 9:40 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
I SAY amazing writing for a 4 year old, is there a genius school? OMG, now I know why my 8 year old had an UNACCEPTABLE, lol kudos to your kid!
at 9:48 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
Lmbo my dd didn't start doing double digit addition until the end of first grade. I would do what you did, I think you handled great :)
at 9:52 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
I would and have done the same thing
at 9:31 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
For a 4 year old? I would have made her do her work correctly and then I would talk to her about why she is pretending not to know things. I don't know that I would punish her with additional work (that may be how she views it), especially if there is an emotional reason she is doing it. Maybe she is going through a 'I don't want to grow up' phase and just needs some reassurance.
at 9:55 PM on Jan. 18, 2013
Join CafeMom now
to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.