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I'm posting anon only because I'm ashamed I feel this way, but I do... is this wrong?

I work in the family business - my dad owns it, my mom does the book keeping, I am the project coordinator. My mom just got a puppy 2 months ago from a breeder. Don't get me wrong, the dog is adorable, she however is getting on my last nerve. She brings the dog to work every day and every late morning when she arrives she lets him out of his carrier and says in a high-pitched excited voice, "go say hi to Auntie!" First off, he's a dog. Second, what happened to me being her daughter. Third, I'm not his auntie or any other familial name. I'm a dog lover and even with my dog (may she RIP) I never said, "come to mommy" or "say hi to grandma".
This really is just the tip of the iceberg. Even my sisters are annoyed because when they too bring their kids to see grandma it's all about the dog
If you mention how she is with the dog she gets SOOOO defensive and offended and it's just disgusting.
She SOOOO overprotective... She just now came running out of the office, "WHERE'S JOEY!?!?" Um, just 2 seconds ago you heard me call him outside, so with me would be the answer. I responded, "come on! I would never let harm come to your dog, he's right here," pointing to him in my arms. This is a regular occurrence. I used to "dog-sit" so my parents could go to dinner or church or wherever, but I'm done with that nonsense as well. If we could leave the dog alone in the house while we went out for a bit or he didn't rip things apart if he gets bored, it would be different. He's allowed to do these things at home. My mom is all about positive dog training - don't tell him "no" he doesn't understand. So instead of correcting bad behavior, he gets a shoe taken away and given something else to rip apart... well, he doesn't understand that either - I can rip this to shreds, but not THAT, unless I get THAT without them knowing.

What would you do at this point? How would you handle it? A little trust, a little respect, a little less "d.o.g" would be great!
Am I a complete jerk for feeling this way?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:55 PM on Jan. 22, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • Sounds like your mom has empty nest syndrome.....she needs a hobby, besides the dog.

    Answer by SLC3015 at 1:59 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

  • I don't think you're a complete jerk for how you feel - frankly, it would bug me, too.

    But I'm not sure what you can do about it. Mom and Dad own the business, so it's not like you can really tell her to stop bringing the dog. I guess just stop dog sitting and avoid the dog as much as possible.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 2:00 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

  • she's had an empty nest for 12 years... My baby sis moved out 12 years ago!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:00 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

  • Wow......Thats a long time to be without and then start this up. Hmm, not sure then...sorry.

    Answer by SLC3015 at 2:02 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

  • ANNNDD... she just came in to ask me if I could watch the dog for a few hours tonight... from about 330-maybe 10 or so (really it's about 645 to 10 or so because my older sister will be over with her girls from the time school lets out until she drops the kids off at their dad's).
    I explained to her my internal turmoil over saying no
    1) I love the dog
    2) I understand they need a sitter
    3) I wish it were easy, but that means we are stuck at home because we aren't allowed to leave him alone
    4) I feel guilty about saying no

    Then I asked, "when, exactly, are you going to start training him to stay at home alone?" She says that it's not until 6months that they are ready for that... REALLY? When my dog was a puppy, she got left at home immediately because I was single and needed to go to work like a normal person. Sure she pottied in the house, but that's why I confined her to the hard floored kitchen. She was just fine.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:08 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

  • I'm a bit annoyed today, if you couldn't tell...




    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:08 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

  • So once I told her no, she replied kind of snarky, "well, that's a shame"

    Now I just need to breathe and let that one go....


    finding a happy place.....


    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:11 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

  • You mother needs something to nurture and shower affection on all the time. She got a puppy. It is a baby. Give her a break and it will calm down after a while.

    Answer by Dardenella at 2:19 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

  • I wish I could agree with you, but she has 7 grandchildren who want to see her always, but she never made time for us girls to bring the kids to her (she won't come to us). And us girls are always wanting to do lunch or coffee with her, but she never had time. And now the puppy is her excuse. She has a very full life with plenty of people to shower affection and nurture, but it was always inconvenient for her.

    Maybe that's the purpose of the puppy... to provide for her an out to not have to see us and maybe you ARE right, maybe she needed something to baby.
    That kind of adds to my issue... oh well.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:30 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

  • They should be crate training the dog!!
    And just as a side note, if the business you work for is any kind of retail establishment, they would fare better to NOT have the dog there!
    I did not buy my last car from a certain dealership because they had a dog there- sniffing my ass while I'm car shopping? No thanks.

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 2:38 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

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