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2 Bumps

If your getting a divorce and moving to another state with kids...

and husband says ok, that means he doesn't care or value his relationship with kids that much right? I would never let my kids go. If the move is because you have no choice and he Can move there too. Wouldn't he move to be close to children? What does that mean. Or maybe he thinks me saying I'm moving is a bluff to get him back but it's not, i'm really moving

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:37 PM on Jan. 24, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • It means he's not going to argue with you. No more no less.
    Stop overanalyzing it and just get the dovorce over with. The courts will work out the custody arrangements
    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 12:39 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

  • It means he's not going to argue with you, because fighting with you isn't what's best for the kids.

    I think you're 1. overanalyzing like someone else said, and 2. looking for some way to make yourself look better and him worse - whether to yourself, or the judge, or whoever.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 12:45 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

  • no not over analyzing i just can't believe parent would let kid leave and be fine with it, I would go with my kid but I guess some people think it's not a big deal.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:53 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

  • Stop trying to use the kid as an emotional pawn to drag the divorce out. Just because he's letting the kid go with you doesn't mean he doesn't love the kid.
    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 1:07 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

  • Yep, it sounds like he doesn't care and you shouldn't expect him to care. However, please make sure this move is clearly and legally documented so that he cannot say later that you kidnapped the kids. You need to document his agreement to this out of state move with the kids and also determine what visitation you both agree to so you know what to expect. Make sure there are witnesses (notary public or friend) there when he signs this. Yes, it would cost money but trust me, it's well worth it to avoid the potential hassle. Does the move also include the sale of a house/property? That also needs to be documented so that you both agree on the sale and how to divide assets. Please talk this over with your lawyer.
    hellokittykat

    Answer by hellokittykat at 1:12 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

  • There is no way someone can say he doesn't care based on this amount of information!! Quit jumping to conclusions. Maybe he knows that moving with mom is what's best for the child, and he loves that child enough to put his own selfish desires second, and do the best thing. Maybe you think he can move too, but maybe he can't. You don't live in his mind. Your knowledge of the situation does not equal his knowledge. Focus on doing what is best for your child, and let him deal with himself. Move forward, and time will tell what his intentions are... This mind set will just create needless drama.
    Nimue930

    Answer by Nimue930 at 1:27 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

  • Happens all the time. It doesn't mean he loves his child any less. Life has to go on for everybody.
    Izsarejman

    Answer by Izsarejman at 1:36 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

  • It might mean that he loves his kids so much that he's willing to let them go. You may think he can move and follow you but perhaps he doesn't want to. He doesn't want you to think he is chasing after you. His support system is where he's at. He likes the state he's living in. He has a girlfriend that you don't know about. Any number of reasons that have nothing to do with his children.

    Before you move you might also think about visitation rights. The judge could very well order that YOU transport the kids back and forth since you are the one moving. It might be for summer visitation, holidays, etc. You really need to think it all thru and talk to a lawyer.

    Sounds almost like you are the one wanting him to come after you but you are using the kids as the excuse.....
    baconbits

    Answer by baconbits at 2:25 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

  • It means that he is not going t argue. He may block you in court but he is not going to get into a confrontation with you now.

    Why would you want to take his kids to a place where he can not have easy access to visitation?
    Be careful this may backfire on you.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 2:26 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

  • I moved from WA to TX. My ex knew it was best for me to be close to my family. He pays to fly our daughter there at Christmas, spring break and we go up there from June to August so she can spend time with her dad, her brothers and her grandparents. Also, she can see all her friends. Make it a good thing and choose to see this as a positive. Good luck.
    booklover545

    Answer by booklover545 at 7:07 PM on Jan. 24, 2013

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