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Do you remember the first time your kid actually pissed you off?

It just happened for me with my preschooler, or if it ever happened before, I'm not remembering it. Sure, I've gotten frustrated with her plenty of times, or really disliked something she was doing or the way she was acting. I've been embarrassed now and then in public by her behavior, though thankfully not often. But I'm talking about actually pissed off, in an adult sense.

I wanted my daughter to look for a missing puzzle piece so it wouldn't stay on the floor for the dog to find and chew up. The task would have taken her half a minute or less, but she refused and went on messing with her Hello Kitty tattoos and watching Diego on TV. I don't know, I guess she was just being four, but it hit me wrong because I spend my days doing zillions of things for her, which is perfectly right and natural for a mom to do. Selfishness and laziness tend to get me riled up anyway. I didn't react to my feelings or even take the tattoos away and turn off the TV, which maybe I should have. I just said fairly calmly that next time she asked me to do something--and it will be something non-essential like playing Littlest Pet Shop or getting a glass of lemonade, not cooking her dinner or the like--I wouldn't do it. I won't, either. I'll remind her that she refused to help me look for the missing puzzle piece and then, probably after she's had a hissy fit, ask her how it feels to have someone refuse to help her when she wants it and it would be easy to do.

The anger passed in just a few minutes, but it sort of took me by surprise. So do you remember the first time your kid made you angry for real, not just frustrated with his or her behavior?

 
Ballad

Asked by Ballad at 7:53 PM on Jan. 25, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 45 (193,916 Credits)
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Answers (17)
  • Ballad--I agree that they remember. My 4 yo remembers stuff I said months ago about punishments and this will happen if you do that again. I get what you are trying to prove with her.

    I have truly been pissed off at my now adopted child more times than I can count in the last 9 mos. Things have finally started to calm down. She was peeing herself daily (at the age of 6) at the bare minimum once a day maybe more. She would then lie about having had an accident. I have done everything in my power to stay calm about the accidents themselves, but lose my cool with the lying. I have set timers to go off every hour on the hour and she was still having the accidents. Daddy lost it 3 weeks ago over this same thing. The timer went off she went in and didn't pee, but 30 min later she soaked her pants. After a 30 min discussion we sent her in and she peed a frikin river. She was warned that it was on purpose and it would cont
    coala

    Answer by coala at 9:53 PM on Jan. 25, 2013

  • You're expecting her to appreciate your being a mother and doing what mother's do. She's four. I get that you get that she's four but, to be honest, you should have turned off the tv, taken her stickers and made her do what you asked her to do. That's what we, as parents, do.

    Refusing to do something for her because she refused to do what you asked is immature and silly and she will not even begin to understand the lesson you think you'll be teaching her.
    Mrs_Prissy

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 7:58 PM on Jan. 25, 2013

  • You know there are very few times I have been genuinely upset at my children but usually it included some extenuating circumstance. Like smearing poop over the walls AND the clean towels and putting the towels back so I grab a dirty one after my shower without realizing, pushing each other down the stairs until someone runs into the door and gets injured, or taking a sharpie marker to my brand new table and writing out her name and then trying to blame her 2 year old sister (and then it was for the lying).
    I just don't feel like a lost puzzle piece or a bad attitude is something to get pissy over. Especially when the simple solution is to turn off the television and have them do as they were told. Getting pissed off over it is just a waste of energy for nothing.
    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 8:19 PM on Jan. 25, 2013

  • Next time she needs you to do something for her she will not even remember that this puzzle piece incident even happened. You need to be the adult here, not another child. Poor kid ;o(
    Crafty26

    Answer by Crafty26 at 8:15 PM on Jan. 25, 2013

  • What's great is you're sinking to a 4 year olds level. An adult should never go tit for tat with a toddler. Smfh.
    And you really wonder why people don't like you. You consistently say the most asinine crap then play victim. Absolutely ridiculous.
    I actually feel sorry for your little girl.
    funlovinlady

    Answer by funlovinlady at 8:19 PM on Jan. 25, 2013

  • The first time my daughter truly pissed me off was a few weeks ago. She's 9. She asked me to make her grilled cheese and I told her that I would if she came in to 'learn' how to do it. She didn't come into the kitchen (she was watching cartoons). I called her in and said "I want you to come in here and butter the bread". In her nastiest voice she said "No, I'm not doing it, I want you to do it". Needless to say she didn't get a grilled cheese sandwich.
    slw123

    Answer by slw123 at 8:02 PM on Jan. 25, 2013

  • 4 yrs wont pick up puzzle pc
    adult has inside temper tantrum and wont cook for 4 year old if she is hungry

    gotta love the logic there, I can see it now

    teacher- how was your weekend? 4 year old mommy wouldnt feed me because I didnt pick up a puzzle pc.
    teacher- hello CPS.......................................

    come on Ballad, you need to learn to count or pick your freaking battle let pc get lost then the puzzle is no good, goes in trash no puzzle.
    but no food or mommy time etc ???
    luvmygrandbaby

    Answer by luvmygrandbaby at 8:35 PM on Jan. 25, 2013

  • Seriously? This is your punishment for her? Good gawd! I hate to see what will happen when she is a teen.

    If you can't parent without going tit-for-tat then maybe you should take parenting classes or get therapy or something. I mean really? Your not a fucking 4 year old. Grow up.
    theMOMmission

    Answer by theMOMmission at 9:55 PM on Jan. 25, 2013

  • actually Ballas this is what you told us

    and it will be something non-essential like playing Littlest Pet Shop or getting a glass of lemonade, not cooking her dinner or the like--I wouldn't do it.

    So yeah you said you wouldnt fucking cook for her. And you come back at our answers all shitty and mouthy and wonder why we get bitchy FOR REAL?????
    luvmygrandbaby

    Answer by luvmygrandbaby at 12:46 AM on Jan. 26, 2013

  • oh yeah. It was the marker incident. He was only in his room about 10 minutes. He got quiet,and my mommy radar went off. He wrote ALL over the walls. He had even stood on something to draw up by the ceiling. Of course,it was a Sharpie. Where he even got it is beyond me.
    I think he was 5
    I just stood there speechless. He stood in front of me,all proud,marker in hand
    i almost cried!
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 7:57 PM on Jan. 25, 2013

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