I have a newbie, a 3 week old baby girl.
My hubby told me I am disconnected from reality and don't know what real life is like because I became a stay at home mom right out of college and.. I want him to leave for work and come home an hour earlier to get more time with the kids, mostly our 4 year old son but I'd like him to hold the baby some too.. He has power over his schedule and could do this.
Right now he works til 6 and gets home at 6:45, we eat dinner at 7 and by the time it's cleaned up it is bath time, short TV or computer time, book time, and bed for our son at 8:15. Hubby does not do bath time but he sometimes reads to him.. If I let our son stay up later to play with his daddy he gets overtired and isn't very pleasant... He gets upset frequently about going to bed before getting to play something with his daddy. I just keep telling him "on the weekend, sweety.." Our baby girl is very fussy and cluster nursing from about 7 pm til 9 pm so he doesn't help with her, so this time is particularly tough for me right now..
I want my hubby home earlier, even just temporarily, to spend a little time with our son like our son obviously really desires and maybe hold the baby a little but the "you don't understand real life.. have never had to REALLY work a day in your life, wow nursing at the computer is sssoooo hard (that is not what I do.. I have her in a wrap or on my shoulder and prepare dinner and do dishes and give our son a bath and put him in jammies, supervise teeth brushing, and deal with miss fussy pants etc. :( ) *he eye rolls* I don't want to come home and do your *he airquotes* "job" for you. Buck up and toughen up. This isn't going to get any easier. Everyone works. My mom did all of what you do with 3 kids and part-time work and never complained."
I feel like he's being really passive aggressive and I tried to tell him that I can feel myself getting depressed like this, maybe his mom did complain I mean it's not like she'd have complained to her kids, and this is especially hard since my eyesight has gotten so bad I can't drive in snow, rain, or after dark anymore so I can't get out of the house right now unless someone drives me.. I just need more help from him. He said he would "try" but people decide to be happy or unhappy and if I am unhappy I am choosing to be. He would not get up today..
I'm not sure what I should do.. ? I keep telling myself he can't be right, but maybe he is??
Asked by Anonymous at 12:35 PM on Jan. 31, 2013 in Relationships
Answer by Rosehawk at 1:09 PM on Jan. 31, 2013
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