I have a "friend" I've know through work for 12 years. She has never been married and I'm married with kids. She has always come to me (minus a few times we meet for drinks out) because I have few sitters and if I do have them, I don't want to use them for drinks on her. She comes to me, which I appreciate but I also know it's cause there's nothing else for her to do. Here's the issue. She incessantly, without fail, every time and in every bloody phone call, talks exclusively about herself, her work, her never ending man troubles. Tonight was the last time. She is so self involved that she got irritated with my children when they tried to show her some of their school work. As soon as they left the room, she refocused on herself, her problems, her stories. When I tried to talk about my own work, she turned the chat back to herself within about sixty seconds. Ten years I've counseled her, listened and supported and now, well, I'm just fucking angry and over it. Do I just never answer her calls? How do I say I cannot stand or be friends with someone so selfish? The issue being, I've set the precedence of being there for her but I'm done.
Asked by Anonymous at 10:46 PM on Feb. 1, 2013 in Relationships
I have had a friend like that. For me the last straw was when my dad was dying and right after he passed, she just went on and on and on about how she was divorcing her abusive husband, but she was waiting so she could get more money out of him, she might be pregnant with her abusive boyfriends baby and she was undergoing an inquiry at work because her new "cute" friend said she was stalking him (she was) and how she took his licencing board tests for money and she is worried that she is going to get fired and lose her licence because she cheated... blah, blah, blah.
Answer by PMSMom10 at 10:52 PM on Feb. 1, 2013
I could no longer handle her self inflicted drama. I had to step back. When she called, I told her that I was busy and really sorry I couldn't hang out. I put her off long enough that she got the hint. She still tries occasionally to have coffee together, but I am smart now and still decline.
Answer by txnmomof4 at 11:16 PM on Feb. 1, 2013
Answer by gdiamante at 1:28 AM on Feb. 2, 2013
Answer by mikesmom65270 at 12:10 AM on Feb. 2, 2013
Answer by cookie269 at 12:28 AM on Feb. 2, 2013
Answer by Ballad at 11:58 PM on Feb. 1, 2013
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