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Visitation Rights?

My finace left me while I was pregnant, has done nothing to contribute, and has made a half ass attempt at coming around now that the baby is born. I have let him and his family come over at the drop of a hat, any time of day, whenever they want...I've never once said no. He apparently is unsatisfied with this and claims he is going to take me to court to get visitations. My question is will they order visitations away from me? And I'm nursing...will they take that into consideration? I can't stand to be away from my children and I think I've been really fair to him about letting him see her any time. Any thoughts? Experiences?


Asked by Anonymous at 10:35 AM on Feb. 14, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • Document everything...and from what you said, I don't think you're denying your child a father who is interested...and as long as you aren't making visits at your house uncomfortable, I think that is fair. If he left you, then he left the rights to have that happy family. Sorry this is happening. I can kind of relate with my first daughter.

    Answer by kabbot01 at 5:11 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • I should also add that he is not on the birth certificate and I have not pursued child support.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:37 AM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • I don't know what they will order, but in my opinion, if you bending over backwards to accommodate him doesn't satisfy him, then let him take you to court, and you get your butt down there and file for child support, too. If he wants to play hardball, then play it right back. And make him pay for the paternity test, if they decide there needs to be one.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 11:08 AM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • In my experience, yes, the court will allow visitation with the father away from you - breast milk can be pumped and the court will likely view this is the practical resolution to allow the father his rights to see his child and participate in the feeding. I totally understand (I'm 3 1/2 years into the same situation). Talk to an attorney and remember this advice - the court prefers REASONABLE people who can learn to negotiate and put the child's best interest before their own personal preferences and emotions. Additionally, if he takes you to court, CS will likely be attached automatically - it was in my case - I didn't initiate anything. I just listened to my attorney, expressed my concerns, settled on visitations that I could live with, and accepted that I made the decision to be with his father, so I have live with the consequences as well. Good luck!!

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 11:24 AM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • I agree with JPsMommy605 ! ! ! !

    Answer by BooHooMommy at 11:36 AM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • yes they will allow visitation although prob. not overnight for the first year. However, if he goes for visitation and he's not on the b.c he's going to have to acknowledge paternity and will be responsible for child support.

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 12:31 PM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • JPsMommy--you rock.

    Answer by dle4125 at 12:48 PM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • My best advice is to find the best attorney possible, even if you have to pay alot, and to document everything.

    I wonder about the pumping thing, because my baby won't take a bottle for the life of me? Um what if your baby won't take a bottle?

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:34 PM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • He is in the child's life and will be granted visitation. My sil tried to keep my niece away from my brother. She said she was nursing and could not be away from her yet she pumped and went to work everyday. The judge ordered the every other evening visitations and every other weekend he got his daughter for 7 hours each day. At one when she weaned they had shared custody. My brother loved their daughter as much as she did and had a right to see her without the mom present. I would work something out before you have to spend the money going to court.


    Answer by Anonymous at 2:57 PM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • You cannot imagine being away from your child imagine how he might feel. He is the father and I am sure he wants to be with the child as well. This is not about you. This is about your child.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:59 PM on Feb. 14, 2009