Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

stay at home moms

I am a stay at home mom, but not by choice. My other is a very controlling person. I have stayed home since my 2 yo daughter was born, now i have no money and nothing to call my own, he is also trying to take title to my car. i am lost and don't know what to do now. i also have an 11 yo boy and none of us are happy. Any ideas on what i should do?

Answer Question

Asked by me221 at 11:28 AM on Feb. 14, 2009 in Relationships

Level 2 (3 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • What will he do to you if you decide on your own that you would like to get a job? And he cant have the title to your car unless you sign it over, just keep putting it off

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:31 AM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • Look for a work at home job maybe? Open a checking account in your name only.

    Answer by ANGIE409 at 11:31 AM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • Don't sign your car over to him. That's all you have to do about that. He can not stop you from getting a job. If you pay the day care. He shouldn't have and issue with it. Sounds like you need to rethink staying With this man. You didn't say if you were married or not. So I can't say how hard it will be to totally get rid of him.


    Answer by louise2 at 11:42 AM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • You need to take control of YOUR life! What's he gonna do if you stand up for yourself? Would he really risk being arrested for hurting you? You're ALLOWING him to control you. If you can't stand up to him for yourself, set a good example, and do it for your children!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:42 AM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • i should add that we live in his house and the title is in both of our names and he has already applied for a new title, whick i had to put a stop title on.

    Answer by me221 at 11:58 AM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • Can you go to family or friends for a while? It seems like he wants you in "lockdown"; not healthy for the kids either. Maybe if you left for a little while he would wake up and realize what he's doing.

    Good luck; pm me if you need to talk


    Answer by Jerseymom1228 at 12:10 PM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • Sounds really unfair in your relationship. I was married to someone like that before and I thought I too was lost. You have one opportunity to live your life and if you do it by someone elses rules then you are wasting it. I tried to tell him i was unhappy and we should go to counseling. He wanted nothing to do with that so after a valid effort of trying, I left him. 2 years later, I met the man of my dreams. We compramise for eachother but we also allow eachother to do the things that make us happy. Fortunately, him being happy makes me happy and vice-versa.
    If he is abusive or you are afraid of that, then the answer is already there....leave. No point in getting hurt to try if he isn't willing.
    You shoud be able to work if you can find honest care for your children and whatnot. I really hope you figure it out, I am so blessed to have been able to get out from under a controlling man.

    Answer by Fallon_Long at 12:58 PM on Feb. 14, 2009

  • Be careful and aware! This is a red flag of an abuser. Keep your options open...try to set aside "run money" because it's possible you're gonna need it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:35 PM on Feb. 14, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.