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My son was diagnosed with autism today. Not sure how to feel:/ I have a mix of emotions...one part of me is happy and relieved that he will finally get the help he needs to do better in school and with everyday life skills but then another part of me is sad, frustrated, stressed, and worried about what his life will be like as he gets older. He has high functioning Aspergers.

My question is for the parents with autistic children, how do you cope? I always had a feeling he has autism but after 7 years of not knowing for sure, it just kind of hit me hard.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:04 AM on Feb. 5, 2013 in Kids' Health

Answers (6)
  • I remember those first few days after my son's diagnosis, but barely. I remember being overwhelmed as I tried to gather information and read everything I could get my hands on about autism. Like you, I was relieved that there was a diagnosis, something we could work on. Two of my sons were diagnosed with autism. The oldest is thriving in a self contained special education classroom at school. The other "outgrew" the diagnosis. I can't explain it, but he no longer tests on the spectrum.
    Educate yourself on autism but don't get overwhelmed. Plug in to your local autism society - the ladies I met there after the diagnosis of my oldest son are now my best friends - they have a wealth of resources and knowledge. Good luck.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 5:50 AM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • allow yourself to grieve,and you will,for the kid he could have been. Arm yourself with all the knowledge about autism you can find. Try to be accepting and patient. The road ahead will most likely be difficult.jigsaw ribbon Love him up whenever possible. good luck!

    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 7:44 AM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • I have no experience to speak from but I am pretty sure this is your same kid from before the diagnosis. Knowledge is power? Good luck! No offense meant by this whatsoever.
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 3:09 AM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • I remember those first days when we actually HAD the dx. I knew that there was something different about my son, but I couldn't get a doctor to confirm it. They all just tried to brush it off as bad parenting. When I finally got the results of his psych testing, I almost wanted to jump for joy because there was finally someone who believed me. Since then, we have had a long road and there have been good days and bad days. I have found the easiest way to cope is to celebrate the little things. Every step forward is something to cheer about. Sure, people may look at you like you are nuts because you son said a sentence with 5 words instead of 4, but who cares.
    Also, for us, I have found it's easier to sometimes just go with what my ds is comfortable with. It helps to reduce meltdowns and helps make him more comfortable. Now, I am not saying let him get away with everything, but a little compromise now and then is good.
    -Ashley
    spiritguide_23

    Answer by spiritguide_23 at 8:41 AM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • Yes of course I know it's the same kid from before the diagnosis but I guess I had this hope that whatever he is going through is just a phase and he would grow out of it. Thanks for your comment!
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:12 AM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • My boyfriend is going through this right now with his son, who was diagnosed with Asperger's and some other problems, last fall. I am too, but not to the same extent, maybe. Let yourself feel sad for the life you wish your son might have had, but then embrace the new possibilities. Happiness comes in many different ways, and your son's happiness might not look like you thought it would, but it will come.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 4:58 PM on Feb. 6, 2013

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