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4 Bumps

Step parents

My son is trying to connect with my fiance. And he's trying too. But fiance wasnt really brought up to be open and touchy feely, you know like that jewelry commercial, so he's having a hard time.

What are some ways I can help them?

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LilyFlair

Asked by LilyFlair at 9:38 PM on Feb. 5, 2013 in Relationships

Level 4 (29 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Is there a project they can do together? You don't mention your son's age - a birdhouse, tree fort, car restore, etc? Whatever your fiancĂ©e is in to and will capture your son's interest. Girls bond by talking, guys bond by doing (yes I realize that's a huge generalization, but it's true for the most part)
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 9:42 PM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • he's 7 and my man is not really a hands on person, he's a tech geek.
    LilyFlair

    Comment by LilyFlair (original poster) at 9:44 PM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • Build a science project, or buy a build your own radio kit. My dh is a scientist - he shares chemical experiments and video games with my son.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 9:47 PM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • Ill look into that ty
    LilyFlair

    Comment by LilyFlair (original poster) at 9:52 PM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • I agree with Missanc have your man spend some one on one time with him without you around...just give them time to build a realtionship he's only 7 he just needs to get to know your man and trust him.
    AnonNdrag

    Answer by AnonNdrag at 9:59 PM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • I guess i just expected them to get along better. or really like they use to when him and I were just friends.
    LilyFlair

    Comment by LilyFlair (original poster) at 10:04 PM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • Get them to connect on computer/video games. They can play with each other in separate rooms even and it will ease them into communicating with each other. They need to have something in common first. Guild Wars, World of Warcraft, Star Wars Old Republic, Starcraft are all good bonding games.
    hellokittykat

    Answer by hellokittykat at 11:21 PM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • Your son probably didn't feel threatened for your time or attention when you and your fiance were just friends, but now he realizes the two of you will be sharing your future with this new man.

    Does your fiance like sci fi movies? Maybe you could let him take your son to some of those. Or rent some on DVD--there are a lot of great ones out there.

    The other thing is, what's your son into? Your fiance might need to stretch a little if your son enjoys doing something in particular. Trying a favorite activity with your son, even if it isn't something he'd normally be into, will go a long way for your fiance in building a lasting relationship.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 11:34 PM on Feb. 5, 2013

  • I agree with the others. Project. Find common ground.
    booklover545

    Answer by booklover545 at 9:57 AM on Feb. 6, 2013

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