Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

"Been there done that", Mom's 'o teen girls- come help me out!

Normally she comes home at 4ish on the bus.

3 times this week she has shown up after 4.30. First day she "missed the bus". Ok- I trust her. Yesterday I discovered her in the house. She claimed she had been her for 30 mins but...I don't believe her. I heard the door open and that's when I went to look for her.

Today she called from the school claiming she had :
1. A geography test to retake
2. there was a game
3. her new bf asked her to go to her former math instructors class
4. his mom was there
5. she was visiting with the math teacher, bf and bf's mom

(she stumbled on the phone and said she was at the school now)

So she basically chose to not get on the bus.

Obviously I have to pick her up from school from now on, but does it seem as if there is something else going on.

The new BF and missing 30 minutes all started this week.


Asked by feralxat at 7:34 PM on Feb. 8, 2013 in Teens (13-17)

Level 45 (195,152 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • sounds like teen romance is going on and she keeps missing it to hang out with him.

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 7:43 PM on Feb. 8, 2013

  • No BC abd you plan on trusting her to use rubbers? LOL! Sounds to me unless you scare the shit out of her like I did my girls. You will be a grandma soon.

    Answer by louise2 at 1:06 PM on Feb. 9, 2013

  • luvmygrandbaby wrote "if she continues to miss the bus i would be taking just about all she holds dear until she can be honest andask to hang out with said boyfriend"

    I think this is a good point. Maybe tell her what you find problematic with her present way of going about getting what she wants, point out that your guess is that she wants to hang out with this boyfriend, and let her know that "contriving" ways to do so is roundabout, really frustrating for you, & also unnecessary! Of course you have communicated with her before; she knows how you want her to go about getting or asking for what she wants, but kids "revert" all the time if they think (accurately or not) that they have to, so just let her know what you want from her, instead of this.
    Maybe realizing she could have this fella over after school sometimes (or whatever solution) will clear up the evasiveness & the problem of not knowing where she is.

    Good luck!!

    Answer by girlwithC at 8:53 AM on Feb. 9, 2013

  • My daughter acts the same way! Acts like she could care less when she is grounded, but after i take that phone away and she has a few days to think about it then she is begging for it

    I would not trust them either ( i know that is bad to say) but you can't. So i am with ya on that one! Good luck with all this i feel your pain lol

    Answer by branzno at 9:57 PM on Feb. 8, 2013

  • Ok she cannot walk home from school. she would have to cross the university campus and there are accidents at least once a week. heel we have even seen a man on a bike hit by a jacked up truck in a crosswalk. scary stuff.
    so i will pick her up

    bc is not an option. i do not believe in messing with the hormones of teens( she is 14) . i guess i will have to start buying her rubbers...sigh

    ok so we are pretty much in agreement. thanks. about taking all she holds dear
    She actually told me this (and I seriously wanted to smack her i was so pissed)

    I know i am grounded. just tell me from what and how long

    she doesn't care

    and no- 3 xs i do not trust her anymore. may have been born at night, but not last night dahmit.

    Comment by feralxat (original poster) at 8:02 PM on Feb. 8, 2013

  • put a big NOT on the other things and a huge YEP on the BF.
    I would not pick her up everyday, how far is school from house?
    Give her ample time to walk home if not too far ( you can always follow from far behind to make sure she is safe)
    if she continues to miss the bus i would be taking just about all she holds dear until she can be honest andask to hang out with said boyfriend

    Answer by luvmygrandbaby at 7:47 PM on Feb. 8, 2013

  • Is she on BC? If not, you might want to get her on something. Unless you want to be a grandma right now.

    Answer by louise2 at 7:41 PM on Feb. 8, 2013

  • Yea, here comes teen years. Went through that already. What a pain she will be tell she is an adult. How old is she?

    Answer by louise2 at 7:40 PM on Feb. 8, 2013

  • Oh yeah... it's the BF. She's trying to find private time to spend with him. I just have to tell you NOT to trust them. I don't care how much you think you can, you can't.

    Answer by m-avi at 7:37 PM on Feb. 8, 2013

Next question in Teens (13-17)
What would you do?

Next question overall (Relationships)
Ex being a prick