Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

How to leave & stay gone

I've honestly grown tired of this relationship, I don't think it can be salvaged anymore. We've been together for a little over a year. This relationship has been on and off for awhile now, I'm not happy & I tell him that I'm not & that I don't feel the way I did in the beginning . & when I tell him I need some space he still messages me & makes me feel bad & just like a lolly pops I get sucked right back in. I know a majority of this is my fault for not standing my ground with him, but he would say stuff & play on that weakness that I have. But for the last couple weeks I find myself falling in love with someone else. & that's how I know it's over "for real" this time. But I don't trust him enough to say it face to face alone ( I watch too much Discovery ID) So I wanted to break up with him today but he just told me he got fired & I don't wanna kick him while he's down, but I need to leave before I cheat. (Please no bashing) Do any of you ladies know how to deal with this, cause I sure don't.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:09 AM on Feb. 11, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • Who cares if he's down. There will be an excuse every single time. Tell him TODAY he has two weeks to vacate. You need to finally stand up for yourself or you will be forever stuck in a loveless relationship. Next thing you know you are knocked up and then your excuse will be I am staying for the baby. Grow some ladies balls and get rid of him.
    You already told him how you feel and then he goes and emotionally abuses you and you stay. Get out NOW.

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 9:19 AM on Feb. 11, 2013

  • Pity is not a reason to stay with someone. You're not doing him a favour by stringing him along. Put on your big girl panties and just tell him straight that it's over.

    You date to find the right person for you. You've tried him for a year and found that he isn't the right one for you.

    Put an end to this and both of you will feel a lot better soon.

    Answer by winterglow at 9:30 AM on Feb. 11, 2013

  • If he truly cared about you, when he convinced you to stay the first time, he would have done things differently to make sure you are happy. Obviously, he didn't. How long are you going to be a pawn for him to play his little game with? Lost is right, there will always be a "reason" not to leave/seperate. He just lost his job, he just got over being sick, I am pregnant. These are all excuses people use to stay in bad relationships and all it does is end up making everyone miserable.
    As for staying gone, block him from your phone, e-mail, and every other place he can get ahold of you. If you have to see him (do you two have children together) make sure you only see him when you have very clear intentions of what you want. And then stick to those intentions. If you truly feel the threatened bu him, you can always get a restraining order.

    Answer by spiritguide_23 at 9:30 AM on Feb. 11, 2013

  • There are no children involved

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:36 AM on Feb. 11, 2013

  • I think this time you should be a little "selfish" and just think of yourself and move on. Is not going to be easy but you have to think of you first and then the rest. he is a big boy he can do it alone. Good luck

    Answer by Alisim at 9:46 AM on Feb. 11, 2013

  • since their is no children involved then it should be a lot easier for you to get rid of his ass

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 9:56 AM on Feb. 11, 2013

  • Time to move on..Ask him to leave. Please do not look back, do not get sucked back in again. It's not healthy. You will find once he is gone it will be like the whole world opens again for you! Good luck

    Answer by madmueller at 10:22 AM on Feb. 11, 2013

  • Block his calls, do not answer if you do not block them but I would.
    Simply shut him off.

    Answer by Dardenella at 10:36 AM on Feb. 11, 2013

  • Or maybe he knew you were going to try to break up with him again, so he "lost his job." You say he always sucks you back in, so maybe this is another way of doing that.

    Be selfish. Break up with him and be done with it. Block his calls and texts, send his emails straight to your spam or trash. Don't see him - if he keeps bugging you, get a restraining order.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 1:25 PM on Feb. 11, 2013

  • No children together makes it easier to move on. You can do it, just push yourself alittle bit harder.

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 3:02 PM on Feb. 11, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.