Patronage and being "chosen"

Most theistic religions have a method for devoting oneself to a deity. In polytheistic ones, some (not all) have a process for devoting oneself to a portion of the available deities above and beyond the rest.

Associated with that is patronage - the belief that a truly devoted follower is singled out by a deity for special treatment, either because they've devoted themselves, or as a sign from the deity that they SHOULD devote themselves to him or her.

One of the many reasons Heathenry is not something grouped in with the Pagan label is that the idea of patronage is frowned on. Rarely is it seen by someone who is not a recent convert from Wicca or neo-paganism, and seems to believe that you can't practice a religion without some story about being "chosen". Or, they mistakenly believe that the claim makes them special or impressive. (it's far more likely to make them a drama queen)

That's not to say there is not an idea of a deity communicating with someone, making their wishes known, or otherwise giving them "a sign". The difference is, that's not something viewed as being singled out for special treatment - it's a message you can take or leave, making you no better or worse than anyone else.

Divine Intervention is also not part of the doctrine - if something good happens to you, it's not because Frigga reached out and made things materialize out of thin air, or Thor smote your foe. You are responsible for your own actions and the good or bad that come of them. The further those actions ripple away, the less they are your responsibility and the more they are the responsibility of others affected by them through their own actions. Nowhere does the hand of any god come into the picture. (this goes hand in hand with praying FOR things - first off, who the hel do you think you are, and secondly, if for some momentous reason they actually did do something, it would be a debt not even your life would repay, just asking puts you in obligation, knowing that it's futile, and basically more like whining)

You decide how you live. Based on how well or poorly you do that, the gods decide what happens to you when you die.

So from your view - is there divine intervention, deities randomly choosing to favor one person while neglecting millions of others for what are often trivial reasons, and answers for prayers, no matter how mundane? And the bigger question - WHY? What makes some random American with a roof and clothes more deserving than the random African living in a corrugated tin shack, being raped by a "husband" who was chosen for her, or a baby in an Eastern European orphanage developing a flat affect over time as nobody picks them up or talks to them for more than 5 minutes of any given day?