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My lesbian daughter and her partner are adopting a baby soon!!!

It is through the Florida state agency, the only babies that are up for adoption are babies that are taken from the birth mother because of drug use...I am excited and terrified at the same time! It is a foster to adopt program, meaning the baby can be taken from them before it is a year old, Florida parental rights end at one year old. After the baby turns one they will adopt, but I am terrified since this is an open adoption and birth parents have rights to visitation and such. Anyone here gone through anything like this?

They chose to do the foster to adopt because the alternative was to adopt an older child with all kind of emotional problems, sex abuse, physical abuse, and overall emotional turmoil from being in foster homes, and they could not deal with that. They are so excited about this, they have decorated a nursery with all the trimmings...they have big hearts and are taking this as at least a chance to give a baby a loving home if only for a few months in the worst case scenario.

 
older

Asked by older at 10:54 AM on Feb. 16, 2013 in Adoption

Level 68 (2,163,852 Credits)
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Answers (29)
  • here is one story that has a happy ending...
    my cute neighbor guy did, as single father
    baby girl days old, from a "mother" who had been addicted to drugs, coke/crack
    he ended up adopting her- do not know at what age
    but his daughter with him since few days old
    she just turned seven
    the agency has called him since asking if he wanted to adopt another baby
    seems the 'mother' had an eleventh baby ( a sibling of his daughter) ((all were taken away))
    he wanted to but he is single and did not think he could handle it, although he wanted a sibling for his daughter
    child has is a wonderful little girl (has some issues, but don't we all)
    she is loved 100% but gives out even more love to others

    hope you have a great story to tell in months and years to come

    congrats, grandma to be!



    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 11:04 AM on Feb. 16, 2013

  • Congrats. Life is all about LOVE, how much love, loyalty and affection we can give to others.
    MamaaSutra

    Answer by MamaaSutra at 11:36 AM on Feb. 16, 2013

  • i thought florida was one of the states that don't allow gay/lesbian couples to adopt? (not that i agree with it AT ALL but i thought i read this somewhere)

    in any case... i think its great that they want to adopt! so many orphaned children that need loving homes. i am sure they will make wonderful, loving parents and i wish them/you the best!

    as far as i know with open adoption the adoptive parents still have more rights than the birth parents. good luck!
    tnm786

    Answer by tnm786 at 10:58 AM on Feb. 16, 2013

  • I live in FL, too, and wasn't aware they'd finally changed that stupid law. That's awesome! I'm so happy for your daughter and her partner. And for that beautiful little baby that's going to have a loving home.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 11:23 AM on Feb. 16, 2013

  • years back
    i almost adopted a little boy (3 then)
    his mother was not able to care for (long story)
    husband had heart attack, found he had major heart defect and future was unknown
    she changed her mind because of it
    the boy ended up being taken from her and adopted by another family (and her next two babies also)
    i had to remember that he needed a mother (and father/family) and that was the important thing, not me being his mother, but that he got a good mother...that is how i handled losing him

    so if the baby is with them, then not- as long as baby does not go back to bad living situation- she and partner could try to find comfort in this way. hope it does not happen for them, but ways to deal with lose is important to have
    if child were to go back to bad situation- i have nothing, that would be heart breaking

    crossing fingers and toes for your daughter and her partner
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 11:52 AM on Feb. 16, 2013

  • well good! im a floridian so im glad that the adoption laws have changed to allow same sex couples to adopt. one step in the right direction!
    tnm786

    Answer by tnm786 at 11:11 AM on Feb. 16, 2013

  • Congrats and good luck!!
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 12:27 PM on Feb. 16, 2013

  • I wish them the best of luck!
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 3:29 PM on Feb. 16, 2013

  • Congrats! Being a Grandma is special! Best of luck to them.
    DJDNY

    Answer by DJDNY at 3:49 PM on Feb. 16, 2013

  • Yay! Good for them to take this opportunity to love this baby! So much of our development is formed in the first year. I hope they get to love and parent this baby for a lifetime, but they are giving it an awesome start in life if its just for a year or so... Enjoy that baby, grandma!
    Nimue930

    Answer by Nimue930 at 3:52 PM on Feb. 16, 2013