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2 Bumps

So...meeting the parents

That went over like a Led Zepplin :)

I met the mom and said that teen could go to a movie and then to their house and a cultural event at the University.

He was going to come over the next day (this was the long weekend) he said he got in a fight with his parents and was grounded.

The real reason he was grounded was because he felt the need to call 911.
Why, you ask?

Because his parents were fighting!
Seriously, if your fighting bothers your teen sooo much that they need to call the police, my kid is NEVER going to your house again. Der, der, der!

How in the hell do I advise her to tell him without hurting anyone's feelings?


Asked by feralxat at 10:35 PM on Feb. 20, 2013 in Teens (13-17)

Level 45 (195,152 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • It sounds like you've set a solid precedent of telling your daughter that certain houses are off limits, and with a WTF take anyway, she probably won't mind staing away. I would advise her to be honest with her boyfriend, as gently as she can. Maybe they can meet at your house or in public places. If he was gutsy enough to call 911 on his parents, he'll probably understand why she might not be comfortable hanging out at his house, or you might not be comfortable letting her.

    Answer by Ballad at 11:45 PM on Feb. 20, 2013

  • I'd be blatantly honest with her. That's a family that she doesn't want to get involved in.... Good call!

    Answer by m-avi at 10:44 PM on Feb. 20, 2013

  • Wow. What does she think about it so far? I mean, about your opinions of what happened and what it says about the boyfriend's family? Her take on the situation might give you a starting point for communication.

    Answer by Ballad at 11:10 PM on Feb. 20, 2013

  • Make the excuses. Hecan come over but any time it is to go the other way maybe she needs to go to the library to study eventually she will find her own way of telling jim.

    Answer by Dardenella at 10:44 PM on Feb. 20, 2013

  • How old is she? I know when I was 14 or 15, I had a friend whose parents fought really outrageously. I spent the night at her house one night, or rather was supposed to, but called my parents with a "headache" after her mother chased her father through the house with a knife over $10 missing from her purse. I told my friend the truth later, gently. My truth was "The way your parents fight is totally different from the way anyone else I know fights. I understand to you it's normal, but to me, it's very scary and I just can't put myself in that situation again. If you want to hang out at my house or go to the movies or whatever, I'd love to, because I do still want to be your friend." She understood - she might have been a little hurt, but she understood. I would think your daughter could do the same. And if he doesn't understand - maybe that's for the best.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 8:05 AM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • The poor kid- I'd let him come over whenever he needed to get away for a while. Hopefully between your dau & his friends, he has plenty of ways to escape. At least he knows it's wrong, & hopefully won't repeat the mistakes his parents are making. Glad you raised your dau to have a good head on her shoulders. We need strong young ladies out there in this world. :)


    Answer by mrsmom110 at 9:43 AM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • Her take is WTF?!
    Also there have been a lot of friends who I say, "Yeah, you're not allowed at their house".
    One friend she would go over and the parents would leave to go to the bar.
    It was on Halloween and I went over to do their makeup for a scheduled haunted house. No Parents!
    That shit never happened again.

    Comment by feralxat (original poster) at 11:25 PM on Feb. 20, 2013

  • Maybe they can meet at your house or in public places
    screw you!
    youre not allowed to freak me out like that :)

    Comment by feralxat (original poster) at 11:50 PM on Feb. 20, 2013

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