Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What to do about my angry out of control teenaged son

He has physically abused his sister a few times. And he has physically hurt me really bad quite a few times when I have gone to displine him. He has grown up without a father. And I'm doing the best that I can. I have tried therapy, meds & other various things. I don't know what else to do. I'm afraid that he's seriously going to hut someone other than me one of the days. I'm to the point that I'm looking into Military School. Please help!

Answer Question

Asked by Marchmom02 at 2:36 PM on Feb. 21, 2013 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • Why did therapy and meds stop?

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 2:41 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • Call the police. Make him understand you will not put up with that shit. He abuses women. He gets put in jail. If the police do not do anything. Call CPS about your issue. See if they can help.

    Answer by louise2 at 2:43 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • How onld is he?

    Answer by louise2 at 2:43 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • His sister doesn't deserve that, and neither do you. As much as you love him, if he can't get on board with counseling, he may have to live somewhere else for a little while. There are boys' ranches and the like. Something is making him angry and out of control, and if it isn't stopped, you're right--he will hurt someone sooner or later who won't put up with it. Better for him to learn now, in a way that won't ruin the rest of his life. What does the scool have to say? Has the law ever been involved? Do you know why he is so angry?

    Answer by Ballad at 2:47 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • I would be calling the police on his ass

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 2:47 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • ENABLER. Call the cops.

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 3:26 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • Is there an uncle or a grandfather to whom you can go for some male help? Or maybe even a kind-hearted neighbor gentleman? This kind of behavior is fairly typical in angry young men who have grown up feeling like they've been cheated out of a father's love. It's not too late for this to be fixed, but it's getting close. If you don't know of anyone who could fill a fatherly role for your son, call the local churches and ask if they have mentoring programs. Many churches in our area do, and the programs are working quite well. Don't give up on your boy. I think there's still hope for him, but he does need some firmness and some role modeling of how a real man behaves.

    Answer by NannyB. at 3:49 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • If you have tried various theray, meds, ect., it may be time to remove him from your home. For everyone's safety. Do you know why he's angry? There are several facilities that can help. I actually sent my son to a male mentoring program in Florida. He was out of control with no father figure also. It was called Safe Harbor in Jacksonville Florida. They are not cheap but they saved his life and enabled my daughter and I to live a normal life. Look them up....there are also some state programs out there but you need to do your research.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:32 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • I have a child who went through this, I am aggressive and I would not let him hit me. I even had to close line him a couple times. I suggest you have a full physical done on him and sit down with his doctor as I had to and start eliminating reasons he could be angry. After this its time for you to sign him up for anger management and groups that deal with this. Also start looking for a mentor anyone who can create discipline and goals for his future we picked a sensei or martial arts teacher. Something that he had to learn discipline to complete. Also keep going with the therapy but now you have to pick a therapist who deals in anger and all you have to do is Google anger management in your area it helps.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 7:21 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

  • The therapy has not stopped. But the meds he was on helped for a while. But the stuff they want to put him on is for adults & they are afraid of the possible side effects. He's involved in sports & it seems to help with channelling his anger. They think the main reason for his anger is because his father walked out of his life when he was 3. And his half-sister has a daddy. And my b/f's daughter has well my b/f of course. They also think its because I was with my last b/f for six years. My son called him Dad. Despite the fact that he was amazing to my son. I finally had to leave him. Because he physically abused me for those six years. So now my son wonders how long my current relationship is going to last. And is afraid of getting attached. He is 13, & in those 13 years. I've done my best to give him everything. With little or no financial help from his father. Whatever I give him. Is never enough in his eyes.

    Comment by Marchmom02 (original poster) at 8:36 PM on Feb. 21, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.