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Please dont think badly....

I am just wondering if any of you have ever had the feeling of motherhood not being what you thought?? All I have ever wanted was to be a mommy and now that I have a beautiful, healthly baby I HATE it. Everyday i dread.....I dont enjoy any aspect of being a mother. I love my son but sometimes wish I had never had a baby. Then I have feelings of guilt because I know how fortunate I am to have a healthy child. I have been feeling this since he was born(7months ago). Sometimes I feel like I am going crazy. Any advice??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:24 AM on Feb. 15, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (21)
  • Well. Motherhood *isn't* what the glossy magazine ads would have you believe. Real life is more like Roseanne than a rose garden, and infants are more like Hollywood divas than like little darlings.

    Do you think you might be a danger to yourself or to your baby? If so, then seek out help. No one will condemn you for being a human being and being disappointed with the experience! It's OK to feel this way. It's not OK to let it get out of hand.


    Answer by gdiamante at 11:28 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • PPD. Please speak to your doctor and tell them exactly what you put here. If you have a problem directly addressing this with your doctor print this out and hand it to your doctor. He/she will understand completely and they will be able to help you find the correct route to help you acheive your dream of what mommyhood should be. Don't be ashamed because it is not your fault. Good Luck!


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:29 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • have you talked to your doctor about post partum depression?
    thats what it sounds like to me
    Good Luck and remember that precious baby needs you and you are very blessed to have a healthy baby. some women cant ever experience the joys of motherhood.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:32 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • I have started to speak with a counselor but I am still feeling the same way....he suggested medication but I dont want to take meds unless I have too...

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:32 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • I urge you to reconsider the medication.

    Been there, done that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:35 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • If you were/are speaking to a counselor, and are still having these feeling... then I really would suggest you taking some sort of medication. Don't feel ashamed because you need to take something to make you feel better! A lot of women have been through this. I am one of them, and I was on medications because I didn't feel happy about my baby. Once I started taking them, it was a completely different outlook for me.. and now my DD is 3 and were expecting again. I hope you take your counselors advice, and do the med's... exspecially if he thinks it will benefit you! Good Luck!

    Answer by ali_1107 at 11:37 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • THank you all so much.....I am feeling hopeless and your comments have helped.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:38 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • I personally have felt this way as well when it came to mother-hood. I know it's hard and it has only been 7 months .. lack of sleep, quite time, and even down time is hard. Everything seems over whelming.. Don't worry a lot of mothers go through this exact phase as well. Each person deals with it differently. With my daughter I thought about going on medication for it... but through the support of my hubby and finding out she had re-flux it helped. I know it seems hard right now.. but cherish the little things.. they way he looks at you.. the smiles.. even the cooing.. Those will help you through the hard times.. and talk to your doctor.. If you and your OB have a good relationship talk to them.. Tell them how you are feeling.. Just know you are not alone.. and a LOT of women have gone through this feeling as well.

    Answer by Lovingmomma2 at 11:51 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • I feel like that sometimes when i'm really stressed out. On those days (a lot lately since he's walking and getting into everything) I dread getting out of bed and dealing with my sons screaming, crying, gagging himself, all of it. It's like the terrible 2s right now. But then there are the days that he's sweet giving hugs, kisses, playing with his toys and wanting to be held (not very often but sometimes). Like the other ladies have said it may be a good idea to take the medication so that you can enjoy your baby. They grow fast and you don't want to spend everyday dreading being with them. It will get easier as they get older.

    Answer by bassyentihw at 11:56 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • Oh honey, you just read my mind.

    My daughter will be 2 months old on the 26th. I'm dealing with PPD right now. It's not as severe as it was when she was first born, but really. I'm not bonding like I should with her. I love her and I can't imagine life without her, but I don't feel that she's really MINE yet. She just started smiling all the time about a week ago. That helps a little bit, but I wish she'd interact with me more. Right now she's sort of a lump, for lack of a better word.

    But don't worry. You are NOT alone. Many of us new moms are afraid to speak up because a lot of people will bash us or bitch at us because we aren't the picture perfect idea of what a mother should be. Most parents don't tell people how BAD it can be sometimes, they just gloss over the bad parts and talk about how wonderful it is. But like you know, it can be horrible sometimes.

    If you wanna talk about it...message me =]

    Answer by caitxrawks at 11:56 AM on Feb. 15, 2009

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