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I think sex is dirty since becoming a mom

I'm a mom of four, still nursing twin babies. Since becoming a mom, I think sex is dirty, I guess would be th best way to describe it. I have no desire to do it what so ever. I do I get out of mom mode and want sex and intimacy again?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:31 AM on Feb. 24, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Four kids. Including TWINS. Your current attitude is nature's way of ensuring you don't get stacked up with MORE babies too soon! Your drive will return. Beware: It will likely bring your fertility with it.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 12:47 AM on Feb. 24, 2013

  • Well there were at least TWO more occasions where you didn't feel so strongly about it or you'd have an only child!

    Look up "Madonna/Whore" syndrome. It usually applies to men, but women can deal with this condition, too. Just to throw out an example of the kind of thought pattern associated with this: You feel slutty kissing your children with lips that were on your husband's penis the night before.

    It's either that, or you've simply just entered "Mommy Mode". The needs of your growing family have surpassed your sexual needs, and it is no longer at the forefront of your thoughts.

    I encourage you to re-consider the choice of words- do you really think it's "Dirty"? Or is it something you just don't want to be bothered with right now?
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 1:57 AM on Feb. 24, 2013

  • Get some counseling or talk to PGA and maybe she can hook you up with a consultant in your area.
    Parenting is tiring but you might also want to have a check up to see if you have something going on. Lack of desire is on thing thinking sex is dirty is another.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:35 AM on Feb. 24, 2013

  • Get plenty of rest. Then find things that might get your juices flowing, so to speak. Read erotic stories, have some cuddle time with your SO. Try dressing up in something that makes you feel beautiful and going out for the evening with your SO, being just his wife rather than anybody's mom for the night. It's sometimes hard to get out of the mommy mindset and back into the sex groove.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 12:40 AM on Feb. 24, 2013

  • Give yourself some time, but you might also want to read some of Laura Berman's books. She is a down to earth therapist. Your local libray should have some and you can visit her website too.
    silverthreads

    Answer by silverthreads at 9:14 AM on Feb. 24, 2013

  • I went through that stage. But I only have 8ne child and it lasted less than a year.
    maecntpntz219

    Answer by maecntpntz219 at 3:27 AM on Feb. 24, 2013

  • I think your feeling have to do with having 4 kids, and you are nursing 2 right now. Might be part of postpartum depression.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 6:24 AM on Feb. 24, 2013

  • I'm no doctor but I'd think hormones are to blame for this feeling. You might talk to your doctor when you go in next time. It will all come back in time but it's possible it needs a jump start and the doctor can help.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:56 PM on Feb. 24, 2013

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