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How would you react if you were told your child was obese?

Let's say you have a 5 year old child. 4 foot tall, 200 pounds. You have a parent-teacher conference, and go there only to find the teacher, the nurse, and the school social worker waiting for you to discuss this problem...

How would you react?

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FreeForAll

Asked by FreeForAll at 10:50 AM on Feb. 25, 2013 in Kids' Health

Level 36 (85,594 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • Well, I have a 6 yr old that only weighs 47 pounds so, I'd be shocked!

    But, let's face it, I (thankfully) don't even way 200 pounds (and, I'm "chunky") so, if my young child did, then I'd have to know that they're obese.
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 10:53 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • well, I would hope that I did not have a 4ft tall 200 lb 5 year old. How sad, I am 4'11 and weigh close to that and I am sad with my looks and size, working very hard to get rid of weight brought on by 2 things - 1) prednisone every day for 3 years and 2) I love food

    if i did though as much as I would be angry for getting ambushed, I would probably in the end be happy they care abou ty childs well being (but not untl I ahd a chace to really process it)
    luvmygrandbaby

    Answer by luvmygrandbaby at 10:55 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • In that scenario,it wouldn't be a surprise. You'd have to be an idiot to think that a 5 year old should weigh 200 lbs
    My neighbor's almost 7 year old is over 100 lbs already. I can forsee a conference like this for them
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 10:55 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • I think I would have been well aware of the problem before hand. That is a SERIOUS issue that can endanger the LIFE of the child. Overlooking that is just willful Ignorance. Honestly I don't think the parent is thinking of the Child's best interest if it's gotten THAT bad.


    ~Now I know someone might suggest it as a medical issue with the kid's thyroid or something but if THAT were the case teh school would already be well aware of the issue, the kid would already be on a controlled diet of foods to help, and I highly doubt the child would be 200 pounds.

    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 10:55 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • I have a 5 year old that weights 38 lbs. Anyone that didn't realize a 200 lb 5 year to be obese is clearly in denial.

    However, what business is it of the schools? This is something the doctor should bring up, right? Is his/her weight affecting his/her learning? If not then they should butt out.
    PandaGwen

    Answer by PandaGwen at 11:00 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • I suppose it all depends on how they approached the subject. If it was accusatory and I was made to feel like my authority was being challenged I would probably ask that the conversation be recorded. Then I would make an appointment with our pediatrician and get a referral for a child nutrition specialist and make my own plan of action to get my child into the healthiest condition possible (for their long term health, not just because of school intervention).

    But, all in all it would depend on how they approached me on the subject.
    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 11:13 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • 5 yrs old and 4 ft tall, there's already something out of whack, so there should already be a doctor involved.

    To be honest, though, any serious issue with my child, I wouldn't appreciate a school nurse's involvement, because they aren't exactly authorities on much beyond first aid and immunization records. I remember one when I was in school who used to hand out diet advice that was dangerous.

    I can't really put myself in the position of being that unaware of my child, but in general, I think having it happen ambush style at school would make me more defensive. Granted, I can't think of any situation that wouldn't outside of the doctor's office - the other logical options are CPS visit or family intervention. Neither of those are any better.
    NotPanicking

    Answer by NotPanicking at 11:14 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • I can't see a parent being surprised by that. It would be fairly obvious, to anyone who looked. And if the 5 yr old is already 4 ft tall, while the weight is obviously still a major concern, the height alone would tell me that there are obviously some medical factors at work here.

    My kids both used to be on ADHD meds, and on top of that, take after their sperm donor in being very tall and very, very thin. I used to rip their school a new one every time they'd tell me I needed to feed my kids more. Exact words from them: You're starving your children. How the hell am I starving my kids when I feed them 3 meals a day, offer them snacks, and practically force the food down their throats? They have no idea what goes on in the home and should NOT be getting involved in medical issues like that. Those are things for a doctor to be concerned with (which, btw, in my case, the dr wasn't concerned!).
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 11:18 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • I have to agree with NP. ^^^
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 11:20 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • While I'd like to say I would expect it, that wouldn't be the case. From the outside looking in I can completely see that a 200 pound 5 year old has something terribly wrong with their weight. However, if I were actually in that situation, I'd be so delusional I'd think nothing was wrong with my child and that the teacher, the nurse, and the social worker were out to get me.

    I've seen this several times on various Dr. Phil episodes. The child is obviously horribly obese and one or both parents are in denial and incredibly defensive about their child's weight. They though nothing was wrong with their child, that they were just a "little" chunky, or that there was some medical problem that 10 doctors doing tons of tests just hadn't found yet.
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 11:27 AM on Feb. 25, 2013

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