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4 Bumps

DD is starting to cause a scene when it's time to come home. What can we do?

Recently DH has been doing more of the picking DD up from school and she's been giving him a hard time about leaving. Crying and making a scene with no real excuse as to why. Like some days ago she made a scene, crying and such that he called me to try and talk to her to get her to come home. When she got home and I asked again what the problem was she said that dad made her take medicine (which happened early in the morning b4 school). Today she's upset that he wants to check her book bag and make sure she has everything and hasn't left anything in the class. She's 6 and these episode are happening more frequently. He's not one to make a big fuss in public or drag her out of school crying,, even though the school knows he's her father and she's not being kidnapped. Just her embarrassing behavior is becoming a big problem. I try and remind her of the rules of school behavior and what's expected but I'm not sure what were doing wrong. I expected this 4 years ago no now. What am I doing wrong??

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:10 PM on Feb. 25, 2013 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (19)
  • Does she have any special needs? Sometimes transitions or a change in their usual routine will cause undesirable behaviors.

    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 5:16 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • no. no mental issues or health concerns.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:17 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • Does she have a lot of interactions with kids her own age at home...like neighbors to play with?
    PandaGwen

    Answer by PandaGwen at 5:21 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • :-). I miss these ages... she could have picked this up from other students, none the less, it is very frustrating..

    http://childdevelopmentinfo.com/parenting/tantrums-fussing-and-whining.shtml

    This article reflected my thoughts. they grow up fast......
    LeJane

    Answer by LeJane at 5:35 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • no real interactions. her cousins are a year or 2 older and she see's them maybe twice a month but their into video games and she not. maybe 2 kids in her class in the apt complex. i wanted to get her more involved with her classmates outside of school but not even the parents of the kids get too involved with class. example valentines day 25 kids and only 4-5 handed out cards. at their awards assembly and just 2 of us were there for kindergarten and maybe 20 people in total for all of k, 1st, 2nd & 3rd grades. birthday parties maybe 1 or 2 show up. 7 kids complete all of their homework. it's like everyone is doing their own thing and don't want to be included with what others are doing.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:37 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • Ahhh. I had the same problem when my child started prek. At that time she had very little interactions with kids outside of school. She would throw the biggest hissy...refuse to get in the car. It was so embarrassing.I feel for your hubby dealing with it because boy do I know how he feels. She's probably having such a blast socializing that she doesn't want the school day to end.

    This year in kindergarten she has neighbors to play with so it's not a problem. I ended up bribing her. Each day I would have her a surprise for her after school snack. Something that she loves and doesn't get often. Mangoes come to mind. Friday was ( and still is ice cream day). It helped. She started jumping in and the first words were " what's my 'prize today"
    PandaGwen

    Answer by PandaGwen at 5:50 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • we used to do burger king but finances are TIGHT and we can no longer do it. we may have to hit the dollar store. what about reward charts has anyone tried them?
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:14 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • What am I doing wrong? In my opinion.  You two are allowing it to happen.  That is grounds for punishment to me. 


    Your DH does not have to say much to her when she acts like that.  Just,  "time to go home"  Grab her hand tightly and start walking. If she falls out. Start dragging her. She will stand up. Or she will get dragged to the car.  She want to embarrass you. Embarrass her.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 6:15 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • NO!!! Do you really thing that the school teachers, staff, or principal is going to let you drag her to the car?? Really on what planet is that okay and them not call CPS on us dragging her out kicking and screaming??
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:27 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

  • Well change dragging to picking up and carrying.   


    You drag for a bit. Stop tell her to stand.  Drag for a bit. Stop. Tell her to stand.  Then when you get to the door. Pick her up and carry her to the car. 


    If the teachers can see that you are attempting to get her to stand. They will not do anything.  What do you all do? Wait tell she decides to leave?


    See, you are the parents not her.  If you keep letting her make the choice. You will never be the parents. Teen years get worse.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 6:51 PM on Feb. 25, 2013

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