So it's been a while since DH and I had sex.. I was super pregnant and that eeks him out so bad he doesn't even want to hug me, and then I just had a baby, and now I just stopped bleeding. He has been saying we should have sex since before I stopped bleeding. I don't honestly feel like having sex, I'm up every 2 hours at night, I'm still only 5 weeks PP, but I said to him yesterday, that ok hunny I finally feel almost up to it.. but we'll have to take it slow to work up to it, start tonight with giving each other oil massages.
He said "No, I don't want to work up to it." I said "but I'm not feeling very sexual, and haven't for a while, I need to get myself worked up to full on sex again or it's not going to be so great." He said "Can't you just use a lot of lube? I'd be really fast anyway." I got irritated at this point and said "I want to enjoy it too! If we can't go slow, I don't know how we're going to end up having sex!" He then said "Well I'll just have to go find someone else to have sex with, then." And I got mad at him for saying that and he didn't even back down, he said "Everyone understands a man has needs." Then when I cried he asked why, I because you threatened to cheat on me 5 weeks after having a baby on my birthday.. and he said I misunderstood and twisted his words.
Like seriously?? Like seriously?!?! He thinks threatening me like that is going to get me to just throw off my panties and have sex with him? What a DICK! GAH!
Yeah, this makes me really horny. Not.
I'm going to make us go even slower, now.
I don't get why he thought that, that would work, though. I mean, threatening to bring some witch into our lives if I don't hurry up and screw him on his schedule is exactly what I needed to get into the mood.
And it was my BIRTHDAY.. I thought it'd end on such a nice note with us giving each other nice sensual oil massages with the promise of more in the next week, but NO. No, I got a refusal to participate, threats, and me in tears.
I think I have married king of the douches at times.
I guess the advice I wish for is : why the hell did he think that would work!? Like, what little rabbit running around in his head told him to threaten to cheat on me to get me to have sex with him faster after having a baby?!
Asked by Anonymous at 9:23 AM on Feb. 28, 2013 in Relationships
Answer by LostSoul88 at 9:30 AM on Feb. 28, 2013
Answer by MrsLeftlane at 9:33 AM on Feb. 28, 2013
Answer by funlovinlady at 9:33 AM on Feb. 28, 2013
Answer by paigesmommy811 at 9:35 AM on Feb. 28, 2013
Answer by NannyB. at 9:45 AM on Feb. 28, 2013
Answer by fiatpax at 9:50 AM on Feb. 28, 2013
"Happiness in marriage is much more about what you give than about what you get." .
The problem with that statement is that that is what leads a lot of women to stay with an abuser. I know you meant it well, but I disagree. My ex said that to me one time. I told him to go ahead. At that point, I realized, I was the one that was giving 100% and getting absolutely nothing in return from him. That leaves a woman open to a feeling of worthlessness and craving of attention that she may just seek elsewhere. IMO sex in a relationship is not as necessary as one may think. Instead, I feel it's the respect, trust, love and solid foundation that is desireable. I'd rather have a true best friend any day than just sex.
Answer by m-avi at 9:54 AM on Feb. 28, 2013
Answer by QuinnMae at 9:54 AM on Feb. 28, 2013
Answer by butterflyblue19 at 10:00 AM on Feb. 28, 2013