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I am the mom of a 13 year old girl who was just devastated to find out that she hadn't been included in an after party of a party before a school dance. Would you say anything to the mom?

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lindamac1210

Asked by lindamac1210 at 3:02 AM on Mar. 2, 2013 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • I agreee that tallking to the mom is NOT a good idea. Our kids have to learn to face disappointment and deal with it. I do not think you should make plans and have her say she was already busy, its a lie. And I do not agree with taking her somewhere or buying her something to make up for it. that only teaches her that if she is disapppointed she can can have something etc. She has to learn to make it in the world on her own, this is a hard lesson to see our kids learn and yes it hurts but you are not entitled to gifts or plans to make up for things as you get older. She will be home, carry on just as you would have had there been no party. Hug her tell you are sorry and let her process it.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:05 AM on Mar. 2, 2013

  • No. You can't force your child on anyone. Instead, this is an opportunity for you to explain to your child that not everyone will always like him or her. This is when you can explain to her that she still can hold her head high and be proud of whom she is because she is a great, awesome person. This is a learning experience.... don't sympathize with her.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 10:21 AM on Mar. 2, 2013

  • Since it doesn't change anything, NO...
    Nothing is gained. Next time there is an occasion like this, have her organize her own party. Sometimes "clicks" are not the best people to hang around with.
    As much as it hurt her, she will grow from it. I would however prepare her to voice her opinion about it directly if the chance comes up. If this girl who hosted it starts talking to her, have her make a casual, monitone, sarcastic comment, "yeah, thanks for inviting me to your party". It will possibly give this girl a chance to appologize and if not she will know that this girl is not worth her time. Keep your daughter busy in new things that she loves and she will find some great friends along the way. Hugs ~!!!!
    LeJane

    Answer by LeJane at 10:24 AM on Mar. 2, 2013

  • I'd leave it alone at 13 it's time to learn to fight their own battles a little. There will be TONS of parties in her life, Not being invited to one isn't a big deal. If you get into it with the mom, then she will ONLY be invited because you said something. And then the kids will pick on her and only get worse when at school. Leave it alone, and just tell your DD that it is okay there will be other parties. Lesson learned, and she will Know who her real friends are. (or at least start to see) If she isn't want by some..There are more out there who do want her around.
    Novmeber2006

    Answer by Novmeber2006 at 11:13 AM on Mar. 2, 2013

  • I have been the person invited because the parent said so, no do not say a word its hard but it only make it worse if you say something.
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:29 PM on Mar. 2, 2013

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