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I need help with my 13 year old son

My son has always been a good kid up until about a year ago. He started out hanging out with kids that stay in trouble, now he's doing stupid stuff that is dangerous, stuff he knows NOT to do. He came home from school saying that him and his friends had figured out how to get on myspace at school. He knows he isn't allowed, none of my kids are allowed to get on myspace. I also found out he's been recieving and sending text messages from someone that we, including my son has no idea who this person is. He has give her his first and last name! I'm so worried about him, I don't know what to do, if I don't nip things right now it will be impossible when he gets older. What do I do? I really need suggestions.

 
TammyG.

Asked by TammyG. at 8:06 PM on Feb. 15, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (5)
  • well tell him u will let the school know what he is doing on the comp and he will pay the consequences for also with the texting tell him you will take his phone away or completely block the texting....my boys r 14 i have gone through the same thing when they were hanging out with people doing stupid things i started taking things away and put an earlier curfew on them

    RIERIE

    Answer by RIERIE at 8:13 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • Don't you just love the teen years? We've run into issues with our teens also. We start restricting them and taking away their favorite things. We tell them that if we can't trust them, they won't be allowed to go out with their friends, go to football games etc. Basically, we say do what you're supposed to do and earn your freedom, or spend your teen years at home with mom and dad. We don't give in either. If we give them a consequence, we stick with it. If your son is texting someone he doesn't even know, I would take the cell away from him. We had to take our oldest dd's cell from her.
    Littlebit722

    Answer by Littlebit722 at 8:15 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • He don't have a cell phone, he did all this on my phone. My husband and I have been reading the text, thats how we found out what he had been doing.
    TammyG.

    Answer by TammyG. at 8:32 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • Agreed. Teens have a lot of freedom but aren't always mature enough to handle it. I read something recently that was describing the way a teenagers brain works. The analogy they gave to understand the difference between a teenage brain and adult brain was essentially that a teenagers brain has great acceleration but the brakes suck! They don't know how, when to say no and they don't have the life experience either. They depend on you, whether they know it or not, to say no for them when they can't. So, the cell phone, computer, whatever are all privileges that come with responsibilities. Sit down and come up with a contract (a list of rules that are to be followed) which clearly lists consequences. You and your son should sign it. Then uphold it. Amend as needed. This makes it very clear what is expected of him and what will happen if he doesn't hold up his end of the bargain. Good Luck!
    ANGIE409

    Answer by ANGIE409 at 8:38 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • Cancel the cell phone, or at least the texting. He doesnt need it and he isn't using it responsibly. Cancel it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:05 AM on Feb. 17, 2009