Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Three year old daughter acting out after new baby...

Our 3 year old daughter is acting out not only at home, but now at preschool. We tell her what we expect of her, but she completely ignores us (mom and dad and teachers). When we ask her if she knows what we said she is able to repeat what we wanted her to do,but she chooses to ignore us. What can we do, together with her teacher so that our daughter can return back to the smart respectable little girl that she used to be? Also she only started to act out at home after her little brother was home for two weeks.  At school it started last week. Please help!


Asked by Ncostello at 5:33 PM on Mar. 4, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 2 (10 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Yes! She is a BIG sister and that's a HUGE job. She is in charge of undoing the tabs at diaper time, opening the wipes, playing with baby's toys, everything! Tell her the baby is a gift to her and will be her best friend for life, and when baby is big they will play together all day! Take her to the library when you can and when baby naps sit down and look her in the eye while you do a project and sing songs and be super happy. Never say anything like "I can't do this with you because the baby needs this" and such. Good luck! I have a 3 year old and a 3 month old and my oldest adores her sister and helps in every way.

    Answer by staciandababy at 7:11 PM on Mar. 4, 2013

  • Make her your little helper for everything!    Loading dryer, folding clothes, getting wipes for diaper changes.....anything.  Heap on the praise.  Get her a baby doll to take care of.  Make sure she gets some of your....and dad's.......undivided time each day to play, cuddle, etc.  Doesn't have to be too long a time.  Have a cuddly reading time.  Take her to lunch or to the park once in awhile by herself because "big girls get to do these sort of things".   It should pass once she knows she is still loved and has not been replaced.  GL 


    Answer by silverthreads at 5:39 PM on Mar. 4, 2013

  • It sounds like your little girl may be acting out to get attention, since in her world, the new baby has upstaged her. Can you spend some one-on-one time with her, so she sees that behaving will get her positive interactions with her parents?

    Answer by Ballad at 5:40 PM on Mar. 4, 2013

  • Since you are pretty sure it's because of the new baby I suggest you do what me and my fiance have done with our 2 year old. We have 2 girls, one is 2 years old and our youngest is 2 months old. I started to have mommy and me time and daddy and me time, for 15 minutes everyday she gets either her father or me exclusively for 15 mins of play time doing whatever game she wants in addition to the normal routine. Plus, we make sure her sister is not in the room she chooses to play in.
    This has helped a lot, now since she's 2 she's not in preschool yet so I'm afraid I don't have advice for that but maybe knowing she gets the one-on-one will help?

    Answer by AbbysMom1017 at 5:45 PM on Mar. 4, 2013

  • and I say a lot "No baby, you can't eat cereal only big sister's can" or "No baby, you can't take a bath that's only for big kids like your sister!" my 3 year old loves when i tell baby she can't do things because she's not big like sister.

    Answer by staciandababy at 7:13 PM on Mar. 4, 2013

  • I agree with all the PP's also make special time for you and your older daughter such as bring her to the park,or ice cream,movies something that is just for you and her.It helped A LOT when my DD was born to make my older DS less jealous G/L and Congrats.

    Answer by liss05 at 9:17 PM on Mar. 4, 2013