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Do families with one parent as a step-parent ever really work?

Every family I have ever seen where there is a step-parent eventually ends up being dysfunctional. I have never seen it work. Especially when the step-children become teens. Have you any experience with it working?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:46 PM on Feb. 15, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • well, I was raised by my mom and step-dad. I am 36 now and I had a great life.

    I am now with a man who is step-father to my 8yo. Of course, I think we are just fine.

    Btw, lots of families with BOTH bio parents are dysfunctional so there ya go.
    MammaMia72

    Answer by MammaMia72 at 11:01 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • I am living it!!! I have 2 step-children, a girl who I have raised since she was 7, and is now 20. Also a boy, who I have raised since he was 1, and now 14. It is not asbad as you think. Just be smart about your parenting. They all are advocates for me, and me as forthem. It can work just dony be a control freek!!! Step parents should to "ME" be just the secondary, and all will fall in line. My step daughter calls me all the time when she needs advice, cuz I stepped back, let the parents parent, and I was the fun one who had to run it through her parents!!
    jennieo622

    Answer by jennieo622 at 11:01 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • I am from a family where I had a step sister in my teens and she was a teenager. Our parents are still together 13 years later, so I am guessing that it worked out okay.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 11:02 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • im doing it...my daughters real father bailed on us when she was born. and when my husband came into the picture my daughter took to him right away. as for the teen years well we are not there yet. and there will come a time when she needs to know but for right now i will just let things be. but they love each other dearly and i have no doubt that we will make it work. she was young enouph to were this is all she knows. its not like this is something new. i only hope that it will continue like this-
    sandraberke

    Answer by sandraberke at 11:06 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • when i was 4 my mom remarried, that is the man i have always called daddy, yes step families work, he brought two children to the marriage my mom brought me and together they had one more. none of us use the term step or half, we are sisters and brother. i dont call my dad my step dad. when he passed away the 4 of us came together as a his children and grieved.

    They only work if the step parent doesnt treat the step child like they are a step child, when my real father remarried his wife treated me like i was dirt, she told the two children they had that i wasnt his daughter any more because he divorced my mother.

    My step alwyas treated me like i was his own he never called me his step daughter i was his daughter even to those who knew differently they always spoke of me as his daughter. teen years are hard no matter what having a step in hte mix really doesnt change that fact, teens are just a tough time in general.
    3_ring_circus_

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 11:08 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • We have been quiet successful. My husband and I each had children when we married each other and then we had our daughter together. My step son now lives with us and I take care of him and I am his mom just as if I had given birth to him. We have been married for almost 7 years now. My boys love my husband and value him as a father in their lives.

    Magpie75

    Answer by Magpie75 at 11:17 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • My Husband is the stepfather to my son and it's been working for 9 years now.
    mommatime78

    Answer by mommatime78 at 11:27 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • I am a stepmother....but I guess it is a bit different because his mother is absent pretty much..he's almost 12 and things are working out just fine. Also DH is a stepfather to my daughter and that relationship is good too...she is 6. It can get really frustrating at times though...i can admit that.
    Carli26

    Answer by Carli26 at 11:33 PM on Feb. 15, 2009

  • My son perfers his step dad over the real thing. If you ask who his dad is, he will tell you his (step) dad and call his real dad by his name
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:31 AM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • I had a step mother and a step father growing up, and yea I put them, and my real parents through hell growing up, but now I have great relationships with both of them. my biggest issue then was not "needing" another set of parents, so I agree with jennieo-just take a step back, be a friend, or source of support rather then a disaplinary figure or parent
    gypsymama532

    Answer by gypsymama532 at 12:40 AM on Feb. 16, 2009

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