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Why is she correcting everything?

It seems like since my daughter turned five at the beginning of the month, she's found her smarty pants voice. She has to correct everything! I asked her to take her toy dolphin upstairs and put it in the tub when she went to have a bath after dinner, and she said, in this oh so patient voice like she was talking to the dumbest person on the planet, "Mom, it's not a dolphin. It's a whale." Or at dinner her dad asked her to hurry and finish up, since the rest of us were done, and she had to point out that he still had three peas and a scrap of carrot on his plate. You could all but hear the eye roll, you didn't have to see it. What gives?


Asked by Ballad at 9:26 PM on Mar. 10, 2013 in General Parenting

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Answers (5)
  • Sounds like a phase. lol. My 3yo is already having bouts of it. I think if I checked her dresser drawers they would certainly contain smarty pants!

    Answer by tessiedawg at 9:34 PM on Mar. 10, 2013

  • In my house that is back talking or being sasy. Back when my kids were growing up (they are adults now)they got a spanking for that.

    Answer by louise2 at 9:34 PM on Mar. 10, 2013

  • I think some of it is about being literal. (In a pretty straightforward way, not truly "sassy" as far as intention.) And sometimes it can reflect a reaction to how she was addressed; she may push back some when she feels pushed, or minimized, or "maneuvered" instead of seen. It's like being cranky & pointing out errors of fact are a way of communicating that what just happened didn't feel good. It can be pretty innocuous.

    But this is the kind of thing that (typically) did not fly with our own parents, which is why it is so "triggering" to be on the receiving end. I know my own (internal) reactions can be heated & intense! But that is evidence of an old "stuck place" in me left over from when someone (my parents, or a teacher) projected their baggage onto me. When I react the same way, I pass that along.

    When we are attuned, we're in tune with what's actually happening (intent) rather than viewing our interpretations as fact.

    Answer by girlwithC at 12:41 AM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • Oh louise! You are a real gem!

    So glad you weren't my mother!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:00 PM on Mar. 10, 2013

  • Oh, anonymous go crawl back in your hole. When I was growing up, that was called back talking or being sassy. It didn't get me a spanking, but on a good day I would get sent to my room. On a bad day, I would get slapped for it. I call it being disrespectful and do call my kids out on it. Granted my youngest is 12 and at that age, should know better so I am harder on him for it, tell him he is being disrespectful and he loses a privilege. At 5, I would simply explain that correcting people (especially mom, dad or a teacher) like that is disrespectful.

    Answer by tempsingl3mom at 11:38 PM on Mar. 10, 2013