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2 Bumps

So, my ex-husband said...

that 2 problems he had with moving to the city in which I live are: his wife doesn't want to have to change doctors and he is afraid of being so close to me too often;something may happen.

lol. i reminded him that while my marriage is miserable right now we are both still remarried therefore nothing will happen.
we get along amazingly for our son but I hadn't realized he still had those types of feelings for me. we have been split since 2001.

should i tell hubby? did i handle it well?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:01 PM on Mar. 11, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (18)
  • No, don't tell him. Just let it go.

    Answer by 3libras at 4:03 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • don't tell hubby because it will just cause huge issues. If you don't care for your ex then don't worry about how he feels.
    Now he's wife doesn't want to change doctors? So he choosing a pathetic excuse over being close to his kids? Why can't his wife keep the same doctor and travel to see her when she needs to.

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 4:03 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • I wouldn't tell your husband, especially if you're already having trouble in your marriage.

    I think you handled it fine, but I also think that if he does move to your city, you might want to make sure he's kept at arm's length. Get along for your son's benefit, certainly, but just make sure that all contact is child-related, and nothing else. Once everyone sees that there is nothing more there than two parents trying to raise their child, there shouldn't be any jealousy, and he should realize that even if he does still have any feelings for you, he should not act on them.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 4:05 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • lostsoul, i believe the wife is selfish but my ex sees our son every week. we meet 1/2 way and do the trade off so he gets him friday afternoon through monday morning. you couldn't keep him away from his kid =)
    first the wife's excuse was that she wanted to be near her dad - well the dad died. now it's her doctor. she is just selfish.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:08 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • sounds like insecurity issues then. Maybe she is worried about her husband being close you. Good to hear that your ex is a very involved father. You don't hear many of those anymore.

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 4:10 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • why would you tell hubby is the real question?
    to make him jealous? to make him hate your ex? to make things more miserable?

    you handled fine...until you asked if you should tell your current husband
    no, do not mention this to your husband

    if all the women told their current husbands what stupid things an ex said- there would be no room for any other converstaion

    Answer by fiatpax at 4:11 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • nah, i wouldn't tell my hubby. he is so un-jealous that it wouldn't even phase him. i guess i wish it would bother him! i truly have no feelings for my ex anyways.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:17 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • That was entirely inappropriate for him to say because you are both married. I wouldn't be flattered by this comment, I'd want to have clearer boundaries.

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 4:17 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • I wouldn't tell my DH. I'd handle it myself.

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 4:18 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

  • do not tell him

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 4:18 PM on Mar. 11, 2013

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