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2 Bumps

My girlfriend and I are wondering...

We figured, cafemom would be the best place to ask this question. My friend and I were talking about each others boyfriend exes. Just causal girl talk. She showed me her boyfriends ex, I told her she wasn't the prettiest girl. She thinks she is. I showed her my boyfriends ex, and she laughed, and said she looked like that creature off of lord of the rings! ! I think she's pretty ! LOL!

So why is it that we find our boyfriends ex attractive , but if we had no idea who they were, we would think otherwise? We're curious. Is it our minds playin tricks on us?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:53 PM on Mar. 12, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • Maybe your boyfriends are building these women up, trying to make you live up to them. Maybe they're trying to make you feel insecure about yourselves to make you kiss their stupid, smelly hairy asses! Maybe you should stop judging how other women appear & take a deeper look at your current relationships & your self worth. Ponder that....


    Answer by mrsmom110 at 7:57 PM on Mar. 12, 2013

  • Mrsmom.
    Relax sweetie. Get the stick out of your bum perhaps? We are simply having a fun casual talk. As if you and your girlfriend/s had one of these talks! (;

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:00 PM on Mar. 12, 2013

  • I'm perfectly relaxed sweetie. And no sticks up there either. (It's an exit only) I just gave you some deeper perspective to answer that question you asked. Kinda like a CM version of Oprah or Dr. Phil :p

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 8:07 PM on Mar. 12, 2013

  • No, as a matter of fact I have never stalked my BF's Ex's and commented on their looks. They were obviously lacking something. Otherwise they wouldn't be EXs.

    Answer by feralxat at 8:09 PM on Mar. 12, 2013

  • I can agree with that Feral! Haha!!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:13 PM on Mar. 12, 2013

  • Deeper perspective? Yeah, sure. Relax.
    Lol. It's called silly girl talk. Go have one. You'll feel better. Always nice to have a good laugh about things!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:15 PM on Mar. 12, 2013

  • Maybe you're bi.

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 9:54 PM on Mar. 12, 2013

  • *Eye roll.*

    Okay, I try not to bring up my disability when there's no real point to it, but I'm going to tell you what I always tell people when they start carrying on about how somebody looks, or ought to look, or doesn't look--sighted people are a pain in the ass!

    Answer by Ballad at 12:33 AM on Mar. 13, 2013

  • I saw pictures of my husband's exes. In fact, they're still in a box somewhere. Didn't think they were pretty OR ugly. They just WERE. They existed. So what?

    Answer by gdiamante at 12:56 AM on Mar. 13, 2013

  • I can see how it would crack you up to have that same experience, reversed, for each of you!

    I haven't had that experience of reality-checking whether or not an ex is "objectively" attractive with someone else. Honestly, I don't recall having thought about/evaluated his ex-girlfriends' appearances. I remember thinking about what the relationship was like, and when (getting to know each other) he & I talked about that aspect of the past that's what we had focused on, anyway: I heard about what they were like. And when he got in touch with his college girlfriend after their alumni directory came out, he told me all about what they'd talked about. (I remember he was pleased to know that she sounded like she was doing well in life, she chatted about her husband & 7 year old son, she sounded happy, she mentioned liking the then-new Bob Dylan album, which I also liked.)

    As for the Why, maybe some comparing is happening.

    Answer by girlwithC at 10:08 AM on Mar. 13, 2013

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