A friend asked a question: Don't know,how to answer.. Advice needed. (About an affair & birth certificate.)

If your married & have an affair,become pregnant.. Does your,husband automatically get added on the birth certificate or is it,whoever you tell the hospital is the babies father?
What is the correct legal steps,in a situation like this?.. since,she wants to do what is best..She knows,she made a mistake but now it's about the baby.
Thank you,for helping.. I was at a loss,on what information to provide her.
Please only constructive advice & no bashing,thank you.

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:49 PM on Mar. 16, 2013 in General Parenting

Answers (23)

The baby's father needs to sign an acknowledgement of paternity to be onthe birth certificate. Otherwise the "defaul" will be her husband unless she states otherwise in which case no paternal name will be added.
Though it might be in her best interest to ave a DNA test to confirm who the father is.

Answer by KristiS11384 at 11:52 PM on Mar. 16, 2013
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depends- what Kristie said, and does the husband want to be the dad? because he can make her life hell

Answer by feralxat at 12:00 AM on Mar. 17, 2013
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I know,so far everyone is being respectful since they need to figure out what is best for this baby.
However,is that the husband or the biological dad.. so many decisions to come,at this point.

Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:22 AM on Mar. 17, 2013
Well, hopefully what she thinks is best for the baby is some honesty. It would be horrible if down the road everybody's lives in the family were turned upside down. I believe if she doesn't say anything that her husband is assumed to be the father. That would probably be a question best asked of an attorney.

Answer by QuinnMae at 12:23 AM on Mar. 17, 2013
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I really think this is something that *could* vary state to state. Best to check with a family lawyer about the procedure involved.

Answer by But_Mommie at 12:31 AM on Mar. 17, 2013
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The husband & biological father-that she got pregnant by.. which,she knows it's the guy she had affair with but won't go into details why..out of respect for her husband.
After I talked with her,she came clean with everyone..I told her,this is about the child & not doing right with continued secrets,will only hurt this child down the line.
So,now it's working out the legal details & going,from there.

Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:32 AM on Mar. 17, 2013
if the husband wants to be the dad why make waves?
she may have to face some ugly questions from the kid later in life and she may have to admit to her own kid she behaved poorly,,,but why, if everyone is in agreement?
kwim?

Answer by feralxat at 12:40 AM on Mar. 17, 2013
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Both men,want to be active in this babies life.
So,it may come down to legally what is best for the child.. from who is listed on the certificate,visitation & other rights.
I agree,feralxat about what she will face as the child grows up depending how things are handled.. not to mention,if they child ever became sick & so on.

Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:47 AM on Mar. 17, 2013
since the bio wants to be involved then she should imho recognize his rights.
its the moral thing to do
legally best for the child is to not have to take a DNA test (even if it is just a mouth swab) and be drug through the courts.

Answer by feralxat at 12:57 AM on Mar. 17, 2013
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I agree,with you.. feralxat.
I told her though,in the end of it she will need to consult with a lawyer since not sure legally what her state she resides in will say about things because she is married.

Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:09 AM on Mar. 17, 2013