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Is your older child responsible for your younger child?

there is a family that lives a few houses down from me, with an infant, a 1 year old and an 8 year old. i never see the 1 year old with the parents. everytime i see them, the 8 year old is outside and the 1 year old is with her. she is really good with her, she does watch her, but sometimes the little one doesnt want to listen to her and (imo) its unfair that the 8 year old has to stop playing with her friends to tend to her little sister. where the hell are the parents? i would never trust a child that age to be responsible for a toddler, ESPECIALLY outside without adult supervision! she told me tonight that they always make her watch her, and its true because ive seen it. you have a kid, take care of it your damn self! can anyone explain the stupidity of this? is the 8 year old going to be punished if god forbid something happens to the little one while they were outside?

 
tnm786

Asked by tnm786 at 7:25 PM on Mar. 18, 2013 in Parenting Debate

Level 43 (159,605 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (19)
  • I think it's okay for an 8 year old to take a 1 year old outside in the yard. Maybe they have a high needs infant? I have 3 kids and if one was old enough to tend to a younger one I would be glad for the break.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:29 PM on Mar. 18, 2013

  • No, I'd never have an 8 yr old completely responsible for a 1 yr old. My 6 yr old helps out with the 3 yr old but, she's not "responsible". Last Thanksgiving, I basically let my 9 yr old niece supervise my 6 & 3 yr old (they were playing), in a fenced in back yard without me being outside. But, since both of my girls love their cousin, they behaved well.
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 7:31 PM on Mar. 18, 2013

  • my oldest sometimes helps me watch her younger sisters, but not to that extreme. she just turned 11 and is trying to prove she's able to babysit when she turns 13. the little sisters in question are 8 and 6. and the big sister only watches them when i'm busy mopping the floors (after they spilt the gallon picture of kool aide on the floor, because youngest wants to be a big girl and pour her own glass) or when i'm making supper and don't want them near the stove. the doors open so i can see and hear them all and the nieghbor kids come out to play too.
    noel1978

    Answer by noel1978 at 7:34 PM on Mar. 18, 2013

  • When we were children our parents were responsible for us but I remember my older siblings given some responsibilty over the younger ones and when I was 9 I became an Aunt, and was given some responsibility over him as a baby.
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 7:34 PM on Mar. 18, 2013

  • In a fenced yard maybe, if I were inside with a window open so I could hear what was going on. They're awfully young to be left by themselves unless an adult is close by, just perhaps not in sight.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 7:35 PM on Mar. 18, 2013

  • no im not talking about a fenced in yard. im talking about out front, in the street.
    tnm786

    Comment by tnm786 (original poster) at 7:36 PM on Mar. 18, 2013

  • and they do not stay in front of their house, either. they go literally all over the neighborhood.
    tnm786

    Comment by tnm786 (original poster) at 7:37 PM on Mar. 18, 2013

  • Never to that extreme. Sometimes when they're outside playing I'll have the older one in charge, or if we're in a public place and they need to use the restroom, I'll have the older DS take the younger DS into the men's room. My boys are 8 and 11.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 7:37 PM on Mar. 18, 2013

  • The 8 year old has told you that she is made to do this and than they go away from the home alone too, so I would go ahead and make a call to CPS.
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 7:41 PM on Mar. 18, 2013

  • That is crap. I am sorry but an 8 year old has no business watching a 1 year old, especially outside with no parental supervision.
    kmath

    Answer by kmath at 7:42 PM on Mar. 18, 2013