Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Single Moms?

Okay people keep putting scary thoughts in my head. I have an opportunity to move an hour away (nicer and smaller town) into a three bedroom home with a large lot (with another three bedroom home next door like about 8 feet to the side of the house I'd live in that was once used for storage, but I'd like to turn into an indoor play area for my kids with an office for my business as well).. All my family would be about 40-60 minutes away and people keep putting scary thoughts in my head about being a single mom and living on my own with two small kids and something bad is just bound to happen.. So now I'm scared to move, I really want out of the situation I am in now (live with my parents after my second was born)! I would have no rent/mortgage, just normal bills like water/gas/lights (old family home no one has lived in it for a decade or so, but Grandma has kept it up - just put a new roof and whole bunch of stuff in it)... She said I'd have to get new carpet and probably paint and do a lot of yard work, but the house is still in shape, both houses are..

Should I really feel like someone is going to come in and kill us all because I'm a single mom? I never use to, but people keep pounding stories in my head about what if! Like the closest hospital is about 40 minutes away and I won't be able to get to it quick enough if something bad happens...

Would you move? How do you feel safe alone with kids? Do you have self-defense? Carry a concealed weapons license?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:12 AM on Mar. 20, 2013 in Home & Garden

Answers (6)
  • I say move! I have lived alone before, just make sure you have locks on the door etc. I would go in a New York Minute!

    Answer by jerseydiva at 1:11 PM on Mar. 20, 2013

  • Take a chance. It sounds like a great situation, and letting fear rule your life is no way to live. You'll always wonder how it might have been. People gave me scary ideas before I bought my condo, a single blind woman living alone, and what if--now it turns out I'm not single or living alone, but I bought the condo thinking I would be. You can go to the local police department, and they'll send someone out for free who will look over the property and identify possible entry points for burglars or risks that might be there, and then you fix those. No sweat. I had that done when I first moved in.

    Answer by Ballad at 12:54 PM on Mar. 20, 2013

  • Haha, I'll be happier away from them, not that I don't love them, but we just don't see eye to eye. And you all are right no matter where I live there's that chance. There's a hospital about ten minutes away but the biggest main hospital is about 40. I have a dog and as a new home gift I was going to ask my dad to install a security system like they have on their home that he designed and put up and frankly I love. I guess maybe everyone is just making me believe I can't do it when I know I can.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:37 AM on Mar. 20, 2013

  • I was a single mom for quite some time, and quite honestly, I was happiest away from my family. lol But then again, I don't know what your family is like.

    Answer by ABeaverhausen at 10:49 AM on Mar. 20, 2013

  • I live in a city, with my 65 year old mom about 1/2 mile up the road. It's just how things played out, it wasn't intentional. I don't feel unsafe, because its not like my mom could protect me from the big bad criminals that are lurking out there somewhere anyway. I don't live in fear. I see no need for guns or other weapons, and I don't want to risk my own children being hurt by these items being in my home. I'm single with 2 kids. Beyond my mom, the nearest family I have live at least 90 minutes away.

    The only thing that would concern me would be the lack of a hospital nearby. We're about 20 minutes from one now.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 10:45 AM on Mar. 20, 2013

  • You can get burglarized anywhere and being a single mom doesn't increase our risk. I know single and married people who've gotten burglarized before. How close are the neighbors' houses to yours? Is there fairly good lighting on the street? You have a cell phone I'm assuming. Install some cheap noise alarms for windows and doors (buy online or from home depot/Lowe's) and install motion-sensor lights outside of the house. If you can manage the responsibility, get a dog. Ask neighbors to keep an eye on your house and you'll do the same for theirs, or start an informal neighborhood watch. Keep some mace on you (stun guns are cheap online nowadays too). You'll be fine. It's no more dangerous than other public places.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 10:45 AM on Mar. 20, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.