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4 Bumps

Gay parents...

Ok I was reading about the importance of fatherhood on another post and I came think ok yes mothers are important and fathers are important but if everyone thinks then what about the children that will only have two fathers? And two mothers? I believe in 2013 " family" has whole different dynamic. No one knows yet how these children are going to turn out because it is so new in our society and the statistics are not available yet. I think family is a unit of people that love you and help you grow into a productive member of society and as long you are happy and have support it does not matter who is raising you.


I was raised by two parents and grandparents. I had extended family raise me and it was fantastic. A good loving family is what is important.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:10 PM on Mar. 24, 2013 in Parenting Debate

Answers (19)
  • I don't see that any child needs a "mother" or "father", they need role models that love them. They need a place they feel safe and happy and parents who take care of them, regardless of gender or title.

    Answer by kmath at 1:12 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

  • Kids need a loving and nurturing environment, as well as both female and male role models. Whether they are parents, friends, extended family or whatever I don't think matters as much.


    Answer by QuinnMae at 1:16 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

  • A child thrives in an environment of love and nurturing, regardless of the genders or sexual preference of those giving it!

    Answer by older at 1:17 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

  • Well women are wired to be mothers, I suppose if gay men are wired differently they could be mothers too? They definitely have more attention to detail- which is the key flaw with fathers and why they need the mom.

    Answer by staciandababy at 1:19 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

  • I don't think any kid needs either parent beyond the biological requirements needed for conception. What kids need is people who love them, who raise them, who teach them right from wrong, good from bad, and all the rest. If that is bio Mom and Dad, great. If it's Mom and Grandpa, Dad and Aunt Sue, an adoptive Mom and/or Dad, Uncle John and Aunt Sally, then so be it. They can do just as effective a job - and better, if Mom and Dad are unfit.

    My kids father is out of their lives, by his choice. And quite frankly, they're better for it. He's a lousy influence, a horrible example of a "man", and never did anything for them beyond providing sperm for conception. And yes, I am aware that I chose him. That's my mistake to deal with, and I learned from it. But my kids aren't going to be forced into dealing with a father who doesn't want to be a father just because some statistic somewhere says they need him. The statistic is wrong.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 1:20 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

  • I think that no matter who is raising the children (all men or all women), the children need BOTH adult genders in their lives to look up to, be them friends of parents, aunts/uncles, grandparents, etc.

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 1:45 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

  • I think we spen way too much time analyzing stuff that really isn't important. I have friends who are homosexual (of all orientations) and their children grew up just fine ...

    Answer by winterglow at 2:00 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

  • My brother and his gay partner are raising a little boy, their foster child. He's been with them going on three years, since he was only seven months old. They provide him with lots of love, stimulation, outings, all sorts of stuff. While many may speculate about what having "two dads" may do to the little boy in the long run, he seems to be thriving now. A lot better than he would have been in the situation with his young biological parents, who were caught in a vicious cycle of alcohol and abuse. Sometimes, staying with Mom and Dad is definitely not the best thing for a child. My brother and his partner have a lot of frinds and extended family, so there's no shortage of female role models.

    Answer by Ballad at 2:18 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

  • I think there are some examples of adult children who were raised by same-sex couples.  The evidence does not point to any significant differences, except that perhaps those children grow up to be more accepting of others and fairly secure in who they are.

    Here's one article that summarizes studies on the subject.


    Answer by jsbenkert at 2:55 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

  • Children need both male and female positive role models. I do ot think the part of positive role models has to be played exclusively by a 'mother' and 'father'.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 3:36 PM on Mar. 24, 2013

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