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My 7 year old wrote that he hates his teacher

Today we found a note that my son wrote. In it he says that he is sad, sad, sad, sad. That he hates his teacher so much. And that he wants to kill her. We asked him about it and he denies that he wrote it. How do I react. Do I bring it to the teacher. We have had several problems with the teacher over the year. I am disturbed that he wrote a note like that.

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Asked by Anne6282 at 11:43 PM on Mar. 25, 2013 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I would talk to the teacher and see what she suggests if it continues id change teachers or try the school theripist he may just be very angry with his teacher

    Answer by katehaydensmom at 11:46 PM on Mar. 25, 2013

  • in this day and age, please make every attempt to deal with this in home.
    i would hate for your next post to be about how your kid was suspended/ expelled.

    Answer by feralxat at 12:01 AM on Mar. 26, 2013

  • I agree with Feral! A note like that, if seen by anyone at the school, could cause real trouble for your little guy. I'd deal with the issue at home. Encourage your son to talk to you about why he is sad, sad, sad, and hates his teacher. I think a lot of kids use words like "hate" and "kill" without knowing the depth of meaning the words carry. Let your son know he can talk to you about anything that comes up concerning his teacher, and that he isn't in trouble for writing the note, but you want to help him resolve the problems. Then really listen to what he says, without trying to minimize his feelings.

    Answer by Ballad at 12:07 AM on Mar. 26, 2013

  • Where did he learn things like I hate you and want to kill some one. I would attack this problem at that source and get this child some serious counseling before it is too late.

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:39 AM on Mar. 26, 2013

  • I would move my child to another school. And talk a lot at home about the whole situation, abstracting from the teacher, in general about haterage and that killing is bad. how about letting him get out of his feelings by signing him up for karate, judo etc. these could teach him a lot.

    Answer by kujus04 at 1:16 AM on Mar. 26, 2013

  • I would NOT take it to the teacher, or anyone at the school. I WOULD take it as an indication that the problems with this teacher are enough (no matter how minor they might seem) to request he be put in a different class. If the school tells you another class is not an option, then find another school. Even if he doesn't fully understand what hate and kill mean, the fact that he's using those words to indicate how much he dislikes dealing with her tells me that this is too serious to ignore. If he "hates" his teacher, he won't learn anything from her, other than to hate school. I would consider getting him into some counseling, not necessarily long term but at least for the moment to talk about this. If nothing else, make sure he talks to you. I would also make it a point to tell him he should NOT express these thoughts verbally at school. Tell him he can tell you, or his dad, or a counselor, but not anyone at school.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 8:06 AM on Mar. 26, 2013

  • Show the Teacher? NO! Take care of family issues at home. There is a reason why he doesn't like her obviously. I'd talk with him every day so he can get his feelings out constructively. Give him support & let him know you are there on his side. He feels alone & misunderstood. That's why he is hiding it from you. Open the lines of communication. If he cannot switch Teachers this year then HELP him stick it out until the end of the year then go to the Principal & make sure next year your Son gets a Teacher appropriate for his issues & personality.


    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 8:57 AM on Mar. 26, 2013

  • It is clear he needs to talk to someone. Let it start with you. Show him he can talk to you, that it is ok to say what is going on in his head. Do something just him and you 1-2 a week or once every other week. Where he can talk to just you without something else getting your attention. You will be shocked the things kids his age will have to say when they KNOW someone is REALLY wanting to hear it.
    Start with You talking to him. Then if you feel he needs to talk to someone outside of the home. Talk to his doctor and they can refer you to someone. I wouldn't bring it to the school Unless outside help says it is a good idea. He could not like his teacher because other kids don't or he hears what older kids in the school are saying. Baby steps.

    Answer by Novmeber2006 at 1:26 PM on Mar. 27, 2013

  • My 7 year old daughter wrote something similar to that. I have been dealing with so much after she was molested 3 months ago by someone we trusted. I think communication between you and your child is very important and that should be your first step. Make sure he has enough trust in you by talking to him about why he's feeling the way he does b ask him questions. Next step would be seeking a therapist just to get him trough the stage he's in or whatever it is that's bothering him. Having someone else they can trust is always good and it helps so much. Good luck.

    Answer by Onemanzlove at 6:54 AM on Apr. 3, 2013

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