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How do you deal with jealous women when announcing pregnancy???

I announced that I am pregnant a few days ago and I had a CLOSE friend react very poorly to the news. She has been trying since September and they haven't conceived yet, so when we started TTC in December she'd always say "If you get pregnant before I do we're gonna fight" or "I'm gonna slap you if you get pregnant first... maybe just a little slap" I was always hoping she was joking but she was SO JEALOUS when I announced!!! I was so mad! Why can't she be happy for a close friend! We are BEST friends! We got in a huge fight and now I don't have any idea WHAT to do. What would you do if your best friend acted like that when you told her you were pregnant???

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MamaCatCat

Asked by MamaCatCat at 3:33 PM on Feb. 16, 2009 in Pregnancy

Level 3 (13 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • If it was my best friend?

    I'd forgive her because I know she'd do the same.

    Wimsey

    Answer by Wimsey at 3:34 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • My best friend had just found out she was pregnant too so she was thrilled. Personally, I think she is being a really crappy friend. It isn't your fault that she isn't getting pregnant. I think you should give her some time since she has heard the news and then sit down with her about it. I can't really blame her for being jealous but she should still be happy for you at the same time.
    DDry

    Answer by DDry at 3:35 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • ever think that maybe she is just heart broken right now that you are having a baby and not her for some it is hard too except something when they really want it also just keep reminding her that in time she will also get too have a baby and you can raise your kids together
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:39 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • I have to say I felt the same way when my bf got pg before me! I had been trying for a year and she tried for 2 months. You guys will work it out go to lunch tell her it hurt your feelings have a good cry together and make up. Just remember it hurt her also. I am sure she is really happy for ya. Congrats on the baby and good luck with your BF.
    Tris_09

    Answer by Tris_09 at 3:39 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • I agree with last answer....encourage her to keep trying so your kids can grow up together. I have to admit I was once a jealous friend like this but my friend also took my picked out baby name arrrr
    lesliegail22

    Answer by lesliegail22 at 3:40 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • I had a similar thing with one of my friends only she wasn't trying to get pregnant. She wasn't happy for me at all when I told her. She said she didn't know why I'd even want another baby because we have 2 children already. I was kind of pissed. We had a big blow out and we don't talk anymore. As for your case sounds like she just really wants to have a baby. Think if you were trying for so long with no luck how would you feel if one of your friends got pregnant. I would just forgive anything she says to you... she's just acting on emotion. Try to just be there for her. She will come around if she's a good friend.
    pinkbutterfly

    Answer by pinkbutterfly at 3:40 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • I don't know girls. I am 7 weeks pregnant now, but my son is 7 1/2 years old and I have wanted another since he was 2 months old. It was so hard watching everyone around me have babies, and it did hurt to hear that someone close to me was expecting again when I had been trying and trying and trying and never had any luck. I watched my baby sister have 3 beautiful children and my friends all completed their families, and though I was never mean or hateful there was a huge part of me that was so jealous that they were getting what I wanted but couldn't have. I am not saying at all that your friend should have reacted like that, but I can see her point too. Babies are such a blessing, and when you have a hard time conceiving it wears you thin. I would sit down and have a heart to heart with her. Tell her you love her and that you want her to be happy for you the best she can. I hope it works out!
    kitten_shuga

    Answer by kitten_shuga at 3:41 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • Give her some space, she will come around. I am sure she is jealous right now, but give her time and she will be excited with you.
    My Dh's family was really jealous, they would not call or ask how the pregnancy was. They didn't even call or come see my youngest when she was born, nor did they call afterwards. They seen her when she was a year old. I was mad at first but finally said forget them, if they have to act so childish then I'd rather not talk to them either.
    PoisonousBlonde

    Answer by PoisonousBlonde at 3:41 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • My husband's twin sister has been trying to concieve, and we were not trying to concieve, but guess which one got pregnant...yeah

    anyway, when we told her she was happy for us, but i could tell that she was also a little down hearted that it hadn't happened for her so fast, especially since I already have two little ones.
    Anyway after telling her (we told her in semi privacy because we wanted her to know before the rest of the family--- because we wanted her to find out from us) we just dropped it and enjoyed our thanksgiving. She later came to me and started asking questions and such so I knew that she was choosing to talk about it on her own.
    I suggest giving your friend time.... She'll come around
    LuckyClown

    Answer by LuckyClown at 3:42 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • I had the same reaction from a friend of mine. However, the situation is a little different. She just lost her baby girl a year ago, and has been trying since July. When we told her, she didnt show us much happiness for us at all. I did get upset, but had to realize everything that she has been thru since her daughter was born. She went thru hell for the first year of her daughters life, losing her in the end. I couldn't imagine. We both had talked about ttc, she started before I did, and is still trying. So I let it go obviously. I think its best for you do really let her be for now, and she will come around.
    Tiffany237

    Answer by Tiffany237 at 3:45 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

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