Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Putting the baby down for a nap

My son is almost 1. Whenever I put him down for a nap, he screams so loud. Sometimes he cries for a few minutes other times it up to 20. My mother in law used to watch him and hated to hear him cry so she held him while he napped. I am trying to break that. If I know he's tired how long do I let him cry for? If he falls asleep on me and I put him in the crib, he cries. This is the same for bedtime. Please help.

Answer Question

Asked by fumbles420 at 11:37 AM on Apr. 6, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 4 (46 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Most ladies on here will tell you not to let him cry at all.
    It will take time to get him out of the habit of sleeping in someones arms. When it looks like he is getting tired(when you are holding him) stop holding him. Naps and bed time. Just inform him it is nap time/bed time and lay him down.

    Answer by louise2 at 12:03 PM on Apr. 6, 2013

  • Put him in his crib, and walk away. He'll eventually fall asleep. You can either feel bad that he is crying, or feel insane with a baby that hasn't had a nap and is grumpy.


    Answer by anestheticsex at 12:34 PM on Apr. 6, 2013

  • At that age I would let him cry for 2-3 minutes then go in, calm him and lay him back down. You will probably have to repeat this numerous times at first and gradually lengthen the time before going in. Have you tried some soft music?

    Answer by missanc at 12:35 PM on Apr. 6, 2013

  • I NEVER let my kids cry for even 1 minute when they were little. I let them fall asleep in my bed, wherever. But now I work at a daycare. We let the kids cry all the time. We have to. There is simply no other choice. And you know what? The kids fall asleep and wake up happy. If I had it to do over, I would let them cry a bit. You need to be consistent. Keep listening, you don't want him to get out of control. I think it will only take a few days of crying before he gets used to it.

    Answer by mompam at 12:44 PM on Apr. 6, 2013

  • I would never let a newborn cry that long (at all, and you didn't either), BUT your son is almost a year old and some crying is to be expected. It's part of the decompressing before he sleeps. If it's not longer than 20 mins, I'd say you are OK. You can't realistically expect zero crying. MIL didn't help, but he's doing OK. Not sure if your bedtime or nap routine includes books, but it should. That will signal to him that sleep is next. A couple of stories is enough. We read 2 books to ours before bed every night (only 2) and they know that after that, they have to lay down. Something that you might add is a lullabye type CD and play EVERY nap and bedtime and possibly a night-light. Ours couldn't do a night-light, too many shadows. You know yours best. Good luck, Mama! Hang in there! This too shall pass!

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 1:19 PM on Apr. 6, 2013

  • If he's screaming that long he doesn't need the nap.Or maybe not at that time.

    Try this instead. DON'T put him down for a nap. Let him conk out when he will. They all do. And note whether it happens at a particular time of day. If so, that's his new naptime and no more screaming and no need to hold him. If he doesn't conk out at all... he's outgrown naps. (Not at all unusual... I never napped as a child and neither did my son. He occasionally conked out.)

    Answer by gdiamante at 1:57 PM on Apr. 6, 2013

  • Probably the most asked question there is. Put him down drowsy and comfort him when he cries. I don't practice CIO at any age. I believe he will start to associate his crib with him crying soon and may even cry just looking at the thing.

    Answer by staciandababy at 2:14 PM on Apr. 6, 2013

  • I tried all methods to break that habit from gentle transition to harsh Ferberizing but I couldn't stomach the crying. I realized as DD grew older she got more independent, nap time has become a very special moment for the both of us. When I have time, I fall sleep with her, when I don't have time I just pretend to fall sleep and get out of bed as soon as she is in a deep sleep.
    But to answer your question, I have read and heard people say all sort of things, from not crying to let them cry for 45 mins (sleep habit class taught by a professional) . At the end, it is whatever works for you and your family. And what you can practice consistently.

    Answer by Mariapdx at 3:00 PM on Apr. 6, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.