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2 Bumps

Ex-Wife moved without informing father of long-term plans. They have joint custody.

My BF and his ex-wife have joint custody of their 9-year old son. For the most part, he gets him 50% of the time, e.g. Thursday eve, through Monday morning when he drops him off at school. Recently, he agreed to let her take their son to Palm Springs for an equestrian event lasting 2-months. The weekend his son was scheduled to return, she informed my BF that her and her SO had sold their home, and were now planning a move to Las Vegas. She and her SO have purchased the property, she's done the research on schools, and did not expect my BF to say no. Additionally, their son is enrolled in school in the Bay Area, and has been tutored for the time he's spent in Palm Springs. Now, that the house is sold, she has returned to Palm Springs, and it's unclear as to when my BF will get his custody because she has physical custody. They had a verbal agreement to allow the son to withdraw from school for 2-months, but she's not returning

Answer Question

Asked by Finulabelle at 4:32 PM on Apr. 10, 2013 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 2 (8 Credits)
Answers (18)
  • He needs to file something with the courts. She can't just up and change a custody order.

    Answer by QuinnMae at 4:35 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

  • Not much you can do immediately and u fortunately by the time you can get in front of a judge your bf's son will be established elsewhere and most judges won't make him move back, at least from the cases I've seen. It sucks that the parent who had a blatant disregard for the law generally wins out in similar cases

    Answer by missanc at 4:37 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

  • The best he can do is go back to court and see what happens. How awful that must be for the dad and probably the boy, too!

    Answer by Ballad at 4:48 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

  • It is time for him to contact his lawyer

    Answer by Dardenella at 4:51 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

  • He needs to take her to court. Without a written agreement or any type of physical custody there isn't much he can do.

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 4:58 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

  • It might be considered kidnapping. You can call the non-emergency police dept. number and ask them about that. They may offer some advice on if it might be considered an offense, or you can talk to a magistrate judge at any police dept. in your area who can tell you for sure and issue a warrant. However, if you want to leave the police out of this, then she needs to communicate when the child will be brought back and where it is currently staying. By law, she can't leave a state without proper notice and approval.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 5:00 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

  • They share joint custody - including 50/50 physical custody. She and her SO sold his home (her residence) while in Palm Springs, indicating that she was planning this for some time. They have also purchased a home in Vegas, and she's informed my BF of how good the schools are, and they would be living in a gated community. I've asked him to tell her to send their son home and get him back in school ASAP - because of the physical custody aspect of this drama...

    Comment by Finulabelle (original poster) at 5:56 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

  • The school ratings aren't the issue. She is in violation of a custody order. She is breaking the law.

    Answer by QuinnMae at 6:54 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

  • Call the cops and call a lawyer. That is Parental Kidnapping. Get an emergency custody order too, if you can.

    Answer by Rosehawk at 7:23 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

  • It doesn't matter how good the school is. She has violated the custody order.

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 11:34 PM on Apr. 10, 2013

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