Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What can I do?

me an d my husband been seperated for almost a month now and I try for him to talk to his kids cuz my son always asking his father why he doesn't live here and asking him for him to come back I always talking to my son about it why his father left and but I donty get to the part why my baby daddy I asked him to see if he can talk to his son his son is 5 years old and I think he is blamimg himself for all this mess so I called him to talk to him about the situation and he hung up on me and for me to not talk to him about bull shit what can I do to make it better for my baby's I have 3 kids with him and the youngest is 6 months old

Answer Question
 
MommyG203

Asked by MommyG203 at 8:41 PM on Feb. 16, 2009 in Relationships

Level 2 (5 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Make sure you let him know that he is hurting his kids emotionally by not being there for them, and let him know that you understand you can't make him, but you can make him take care of them financially. He obviously is a very selfish person, if he can just walk out on his children and not care about them emotionally, that will leave scars! You will need to get them all professional help if this is going to be permanent. You should also ask yourself if you should ever ask this person to be part of your life again, and also speak to a professional. From what you say, he is not husband, or father material. You need to talk to your family and close friends and ask for support emotionally from them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:55 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • Cut him out of your life like you would the rotton part of an apple. He's bad new obviously and your kids might be better off without. Only you know him and know if he's worth being around your kids. If he is then make him. If he's not, take his money and tell your kids to ask daddy why he's not around.
    lstrickland

    Answer by lstrickland at 9:32 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • Honestly, if he is not receptive to you telling him the kids are confused then just give up. The only connection you or your children need from him now is financially. Go to court and get the child support for your babies to make sure they will be taken care of. If you want to discuss anything regarding custody with him, I suggest only doing that with legal councel. I know the word "lawyer" is scary because we tend to thing they are expensive and we cannot afford them but it really isn't that expensive. I paid $25 to talk to my lawyer during my divorce and because my ex was the one who left, he had to pay all of the legal/court fees. Do your homework to ensure you and your children are protected.
    cat1622

    Answer by cat1622 at 10:56 PM on Feb. 16, 2009

  • look lady tell him that if he does not talk to you about everything and doesnt start takeing care of his kids like he should be that you will not let him see his kids every again THEN HE WILL REALLY HAVE SOMETHIN TO THINK ABOUT AND THEN HE WILL COME AROUND I PROMISE YOU MY BOYFRIEND IS IN THE SAME PLACE AS YOU WITH HIS EXWIFE AND IM INVOLED IN IT TO SO. AND I TOLD HER EXCALTY WHAT I TOLD YOU TO DO BUT I TOLD HER THAT SHE HAD A WEEK AND ONLY A WEEK TO TALK TO MY BOYFRIEND HER EXHASBAN AND TO START BEING THE MOTHER THAT SHE NEEDS TO BE TO HER KIDS OR ELSE SHE WILL NOT HAVE ANY CONTACT WITH HER KIDS. AND SHE ENDED UP TALKING TO HIM THE NEXT DAY CAUSE SHE DIDNT WANT TO LOSE HER KIDS I PROMISE IT WILL WORK
    tracy210

    Answer by tracy210 at 7:27 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Sorry I haven't responsed to "What can I do?". I do not know what to say or give advise. You must think of the children first. Do not bad mouth your husband in front of them or go out of your way to hurt him. He has been gone for several months and haven't made the effort to see the children or talk to them, he doesn't care. Go on with your life. Get help if needed and an attorney and also apply for assistant with the stae or city.
    FloraALM

    Answer by FloraALM at 4:34 AM on Mar. 1, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.