Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

S/O from Man Rights in Pregnancy question

Many of you said that woman should have all rights and the man should have none because she is the one who would carry and deliver the baby.

So, going by that way of thinking...

Do you believe that the man should have a say on whether or not the baby is put up for adoption?

Answer Question

Asked by AllAboutKeeley at 12:39 PM on Apr. 17, 2013 in Politics & Current Events

Level 33 (59,731 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I think it's going to depend. If he doesn't want her to give the baby up because he's willing to take it on and raise it himself, then sure, he should be allowed a say. But if his only reason for not letting her put the baby up for adoption is to punish her, to force her to keep a baby she doesn't want because she wouldn't get the abortion he wanted or something, then he shouldn't. He shouldn't be able to force her to keep and raise a baby she doesn't want or can't afford or whatever, just because he wants to. He should, however, be allowed to decide he wants to be a father and take custody of the child.

    I'm not sure if I think she should be forced to pay child support in a case like that, however.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 12:44 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

  • well of coarse. If he doesn't want the baby adopted and the mother does. Let her waive all her rights and he can be a single father. So many "fathers" get it easy when it comes to child support or not even taking care of the child at all. Yet they keep screaming they want equal rights, yet they are the one's that are usually paying barley nothing in CS and living their life they want while the mother is struggling to make ends meet . There is way more dead beat fathers out there then mothers. I have yet to met a single mother that has a good child support order. I have never seen a child support order for over $200 and that is moms with multiple children.

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 12:44 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

  • In that case, if the woman wants to give the child up for adoption, the man should have the right to obtain custody (basically adopt the child himself). But, if he doesn't want to, then he'd really have no say.

    Answer by 3libras at 12:45 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

  • I have never seen a child support order for over $200 and that is moms with multiple children.

    Answer by LostSoul88 a minute ago

    Mine's over that but, he doesn't always pay it, or pay the full amount. And, I receive the money always later than it states I'm supposed to in my divorce decree soooo...

    Answer by 3libras at 12:48 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

  • exactly 3Libras and when it is over that the man doesn't pay and gets away with it. Sure they say the man will go to jail for not paying child support. But in the really world that rarely happens.

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 1:06 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

  • depends. there is a big difference between a guy who stays in touch with the pregnant woman, goes with her to appointments, and cares about the child and some dude who disappeared and only showed up to keep the woman from adopting the baby out. if the woman has decided to birth the baby, then things become fairly simple. if he wants the baby he can legally take the child and the mom can sign her rights away...almost as if he adopted it.

    but if he doesnt want the baby adopted but doesnt want the baby, then he can just suck it.

    Answer by okmanders at 1:11 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

  • "I have never seen a child support order for over $200 and that is moms with multiple children."

    I've never seen a child support order UNDER that amount and that is for moms of one child!

    If a father would rather keep his child than have someone else adopt it, then he should be given the chance. However, if he doesn't want the child full time then the mother should be able to put the baby up for adoption.

    Answer by missanc at 1:48 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

  • I think these conversations get skewed because nobody ever talks about exes who pay their CS on time, pay above and beyond what they owe, and generally do a good (sometimes better) job of co-parenting than the mother. We only hear about the deadbeats who never pay.

    I think about the friend of mine whose child support money was going to meth and it took years to get the court to intervene, while his kids clothes disappeared everytime he sent new ones home - he finally figured out anything that hadn't been worn once was getting taken to the store for a refund for drug money. Cunt even sold their shoes. But yea, the poor mommies are always in the right, and the mean old daddies are always in the wrong.

    Answer by NotPanicking at 2:02 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

  • I think a man should get first choice to take his own child. But if he decides not to adopt and the woman doesn't want the child, then the kid will be better off in a home where he or she is cherished.

    Answer by Ballad at 2:38 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

  • I totally believe a man should be able to parent his child even if the mother chooses not to.Though unless he plans to be a full time parent he should not stand in the way of adoption if the mother doesn't want to parent at all.If he wants to parent part time he should look in his family and get help from them.

    My father paid significantly more than 200 a month in C.S. and I am 55.He lived less than 10 minutes away and came to see my sis and I three times a year but he paid every month.It was not deducted from his paycheck.He paid.
    A b-i-l pays a lot ...much much more than 200 for my nephew.He has never and will never miss.I don't know any one that pays or receives anything around 200 .Much more and no has quit a job to get out of paying.

    Answer by drfink at 4:36 PM on Apr. 17, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.