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Family friend's comment

Hi, I recently emailed our family friends some pictures from a business meeting, that involved some kind of distinction for me. 

Well, I don't mean to sound funny, but their brief response was that 
"they though I looked very nice, till they realized that it wasn't me but my colleague".
(LOL, you can guess that my colleague is super-skinny and taller !!! ).

I don't mind the comparison, but I thought this is not tactful.
What are your thoughts on this?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:33 PM on Apr. 22, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Why would they even comment if that was going to be the response? how odd
    cassie_kellison

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 3:36 PM on Apr. 22, 2013

  • why are you caring so much over a little comment? let it go.
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 3:37 PM on Apr. 22, 2013

  • Bothersome to you, yes, especially if you don't feel secure about your appearance. But tactless, probably not. It wasn't like the friend said, oh, your colleague is prettier than you. She just didn't know which one you were, right?
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 4:05 PM on Apr. 22, 2013

  • It was a back-handed "compliment." I would not be close friends with this type of person. They are bound to be a source of drama and trouble. Plus, it would just annoy me that someone would be that rude.
    hellokittykat

    Answer by hellokittykat at 1:39 AM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • Well, it sounds like they were being open, that there is enough intimacy or authenticity in your relationship to share their honest reaction candidly. I imagine the person found it funny that he/she was mixed up (maybe it was a case of being amazed & impressed, thinking "Wow, she is looking GREAT!" and then realizing the mistaken identity) and just thought it was okay to share honestly with you.

    That could be seen as a vote of confidence in the relationship.

    Feeling miffed or embarrassed in response totally makes sense. It is not the most comfortable thing to hear or have openly acknowledged. Your feelings in response are valid, whatever they are. And you are right that mentioning it was not the most tactful thing. It was candid, not tactful. But I don't think it has to "say" anything bad about your family friend, in terms of speaking to this person's intention, character, or whether or not he or she is "rude" or unkind.
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 10:33 AM on Apr. 23, 2013

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