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Am I being silly?

Okay, the back story--I've had a small lump below my right collarbone for months. It's kind of soft, and I can move it under the skin. It's easy for me to find, but a little harder to show other people because they don't seem to know what they're feeling for. I guess it's about as big around as a half dollar. I didn't pay much attention to it, just figuring it was a swollen lymph node or something, but it's in an odd place and hasn't gone down. So after I got diagnosed with Sjogren's Syndrome last week, which supposedly raises my risk of getting lymphoma, I started to worry about the lump and made a doctor's appointment for next Tuesday to have it checked out, just in case. The clinic is right across the street from where I live, so I can easily walk there by myself wile my daughter is in school.

The question--I feel really scared, I'm not sure why, so I asked my boyfriend to go with me. It shouldn't take that long, and the appointment will be over before his store opens for the day. He said I was overreacting, the doctor is just going to check the lump and maybe schedule a biopsy, and there was no reason I couldn't march on over there and get it taken care of while he's working. He's right, of course. But for some reason I can't pin down, I'm afraid to go by myself and want someone there for emotional support.

So am I being silly? Why can't I see this as no biggie and just bop on in and get the lump looked at? I'm usually independent to a fault, so maybe that's why my boyfriend is confused by this. Is he right that I'm getting all jazzed up over nothing?

 
Ballad

Asked by Ballad at 1:36 PM on Apr. 23, 2013 in Health

Level 45 (193,996 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • You're not being silly, Ballad. He's probably just going off of how strong you've been with other issues. If it's before he has to work, I don't see why he won't go though. Have you told him it's really worrying you? & if he won't go, is there anybody else who could?
    KA91

    Answer by KA91 at 2:45 PM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • I think he is under reacting to it.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 1:40 PM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • You are not being silly at all. He may be trying to make light of it so as not to worry you. Lets just hope it's a simple cyst. Sending good wishes your way!!
    ILovemyPaulie

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 1:42 PM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • I completely understand where you are coming from. I, personally, have panic attacks at appointments like this.
    Apparently I have a "fear of procedure" more specifically I have a fear that regardless of what procedure or what test I'm going in for that they will find something. I have no control over the panic attacks, I can feel the anxiety in the waiting room, I walk into the exam room, turn white as a ghost and don't recall anything until I "come to" and I'm balled up in the corner of the room or hall. I ALWAYS bring someone with me to literally hold my hand, talk to me and then explain to the nurses that what they are seeing is normal and I'll recover.
    It's awful! Now I request a valium for the appointments. I take 15mg (which SHOULD knock you out) and still cry uncontrollably... but I don't end up balled up in the corner... embarrassing as a grown up!
    daylily888

    Answer by daylily888 at 1:43 PM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • Needless to say, your "uneasy" feeling and wanting the support is not silly or over-reacting. You are concerned, so there is reason to want the emotional support. I think if you sit down with him and tell him you understand it *seems* silly, but for you it's inexplicable and you really just want him to be there with you.
    daylily888

    Answer by daylily888 at 1:45 PM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • I am going to pray that it is nothing, but sometimes there are just things we have to do but need a friendly hand to hold.
    Not silly
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 1:48 PM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • Not silly at all, I wonder how he would feel of the tables were turned.....
    older

    Answer by older at 1:52 PM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • It's not silly at all. Sometimes it's the seemingly simplest things that can throw us and make us freak out. I would just tell him that you realize that to him this is silly, but you just really feel you need some extra support at that appointment and ask him again to come with you.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 2:14 PM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • Not silly at all, Ballad. I get the same way too. I had something like what you described on my upper back (right under my neck) and I had it removed. It was a cyst and I hated it and was very self-concious of it because it was fairly large. You're not being silly about wanting him there for support and don't let him make you feel that way.
    Nos4

    Answer by Nos4 at 2:56 PM on Apr. 23, 2013

  • Not silly at all, it's a valid concern and worth having checked out. From my understanding and experience, cancerous lymph nodes are hard and fixed, non-moveable. Hopefully it's nothing, but better to be safe than sorry.
    mommy_jules

    Answer by mommy_jules at 4:28 PM on Apr. 23, 2013