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My husband afraid to get fixed

Which is worse? Is it more complicated for a woman to get her tubes tied or is it for the man to get basically "fixed". What generally do each go through? We dont want anymore children. And want to really make sure we wont have any. If any one can help I would appreciate it.

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Asked by Shalyn_y at 1:50 AM on Feb. 17, 2009 in Health

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Answers (6)
  • Get him snipped.

    Why is he scared? It's minor surgery for him - MAJOR surgery for you. 'Nuff said.


    Answer by Wimsey at 3:45 AM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • You have to be put under so there is the usual risks accompanied by general anesthesia. You'll have bigger incisions, too. I've only heard of women getting their tubes tied while in for a c-section to be honest...I don't personally know of anyone who went in for the surgery just for the surgery.

    He has a local, two small incisions in his sack and he's back up and walking around right after. There is discomfort but icepacks work well. My husband was...ahem...fine that night...and all discomfort was handled by tylenol for the first week and gone the second.

    MUCH easier for him.

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 5:26 AM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • I hope I can help. After 5 pregnancies and 4 live births, I was totally done being pregnant, so was my husband at the time. I had my last baby March 30, 2002 at 237pm, I was taken for my tubal at 330pm, they put you under and make a tiny cut in your bellybutton, I was woken up by 5pm, all in a days work. My husband at the time wasn't getting snipped because he thought it would change him into something less because he would be shooting blanks is how he put it. We have been divorced for 5 years, both us us entered new relationships, I got re-married to a wonderful man who loves my children like his oun, and my ex who bitches about child support, is now looking at being a father again. He is so freaked out that he called me of all people to freak out because he said he didn't want more kids.

    Answer by fragglemom at 6:01 AM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • It is major surgery for a woman and minor surgery for a man.  There is absolutely no change in his performance, libido or ejaculate.

    Ticcledblue:  I don't know where your husband had his done but my husband had his vasectomy in England.  It was done under local anesthetic in the doctor's office.


    Answer by beeky at 7:59 AM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • If your husband refuses to have a vasectomy, you could consider the Essure procedure. Google it. No incisions...they go in vaginally and block your fallopian tubes. It takes about 15 minutes in the doctor's office. No hospital needed, although they do give local anesthetic. Three months after you have it, they do a dye test and make sure the procedure worked. In 5 years of clinical trials, they had NO pregnancies. Just another option. But to answer your question more directly, a vasectomy is waaaaay easier than a tubal ligation.

    Answer by StarLee at 8:39 AM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • I had a tubal right after giving birth, a scope through the belley button. There was abdominal pain that was quenched with medication pretty well. (Absolutely nothing compared with vaginal birth for pain.)

    But in hindsite: I would tell you to have your man do it. One of the reasons, you break up he goes on and has more children you dont. If he has more children, any child support you would be receiving would be cut. Think of your children first!

    From experience I can tell you that the testicle sack hangs way low after a man is cut. So low that it will be slapping you in the butt, (it's awful). I hate sex with a man who has had one. (Men are sooo stupid and dont research it.) So you should ask the doctor if he can be firmed up too. I'm sure they can do it, but you know a man wont ask. It will make it better for you!And yes it's true, I've also spoken to several cut men also, and they say it is a side effect they have.

    Answer by DAWN-10 at 2:56 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

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