On my dad's side I lost both my grandparents to cancer years ago. My great Aunt had it, 1 of my other aunt's had it. I think at least 1 of my uncle's had it. My 1 cousin just had a cancerous mole removed, then my other cousin had non-hodgkins lymphoma, beat it, then just had a double masectomy. & My dad had prostate & skin cancer.
On my mom's side, my grandma had breast cancer. My Aunt just had a lumpectomy. My other aunt had stomach cancer, was in remission, & they found a large mass in her hip/ leg. It was just too much for her, & she ended up passing away earlier this week. (heartbreaking loss. She was truly a wonderful person & will be missed dearly)
My problem is, that the cousin on my dad's side who had the non-hodgkins lymphoma, & then just had the double masectomy, is really struggling. She has convinced herself that she will get cancer again, & will die at a young age. Normally she is a very up-beat positive person, but in this instance she is completly stuck in this mind-set. On top of everything else, her husband just divorced her, & she was left trying to find a place to live, (which she did. She's renting my Uncle's house) & trying to find a job, (she's got 2 school aged girls) Taking care of her girls, & her ginormaous dog. And recovering from the mastectomy.
I have no idea what she's going through, though I've been surrounded by loved ones w/ cancer, I've never had it myself. We've struggled $$$ wise, but I've never faced that burdon on my own, or had to worry about my Uncle selling the house i"m renting, & leaving me virtually homeless. Dh have had our problems, & were on the verge of divorce years ago, but we worked it out & things are better now. And though my kids are a handful, all 4 of them put together are not quite as energetic as her 2 girls.
I don't know how to comfort her. I'm afraid she's going to sink into a depression, & I just want to help her, but don't know where to start. Is there any way, that I can slowly encourage her to be positive about the future. And help restore her confidence, other than just being there for her? I'm not exactly an optimist myself, & I don't want to annoy her w/ continuous positivity, especially when I've never been where she is, but I don't want to see her give up either!! Any idea's on how I can help her?
Answer by Fairymom32 at 10:53 AM on May. 3, 2013
Answer by Ballad at 7:48 PM on May. 3, 2013