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3 Bumps

I need someone to talk to...am depressed or what is this feeling??

I feel miserable. I'm never happy. I'm always angry. I fake a smile the majority of the time. I have many things to be happy for but I just can't be. I just want to cry when I think about the things to be happy for.

I have the most precious 3 year old boy! My husband works and allows me to stay at home with him. I just recently became pregnant and its what I wanted! I have a home, a car, just about everything I want I get. But I'm.just miserable.

I sit at home everyday all day everyday. I couldn't go to work if I wanted to be noone would hire me BC I have social anxiety terribly bad and would flip.out at the interview. I don't have any friends. My husband is my only friend and he works all the time. I hate driving BC I have panic attacks and it is one of my biggest fears so I don't unless I just have to!

I don't take care of myself, I don't clean, I feel like I'm a terrible parent BC I don't play with my son every rime he wants and I don't fix him healthy meals. And I get I'll with Jim really easy which I hate! I always love on him and.apologize after I do it, but I shouldn't do it in the first place.

I feel like I hate my husband sometimes and feel likened be better off without him sometimes. I feel like he makes me this way. He doesn't show me any attention besides when he wants to have sex which I hate as well. I just don't know what to do. I will be fine until he pisses me off and my whole day is ruined.

Is he my problem? :(((( I just want this to go away so I van be a better mom to my son and soon to be baby!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:24 PM on May. 5, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • hugsHave you ever tried therapy?

    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 1:26 PM on May. 5, 2013

  • You sound like me most of the time :(

    Being a wife/mother can be great or it can be isolating and depressing.

    Just know you aren't alone and there are more women like you then you think.

    Hope you find a way to get better.
    Izsarejman

    Answer by Izsarejman at 1:28 PM on May. 5, 2013

  • No I haven't tried therapy. I can't afford it at the moment but I definitely.wish I could. Even tho I can't express my feelings to anyone in person.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:32 PM on May. 5, 2013

  • Yes, you are depressed. And your husband isn't helping matters.

    Call 211 to see if you can get a referral for low cost counseling. Or if you're a member of a church, you can consult your pastor.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 1:34 PM on May. 5, 2013

  • hugsYes, you need to talk to someone. A real live person. I have anxiety issues as well and it really helps me to talk to a live person about the things that are causing anxiety. It also helps me to write them down and then analyze them. Sometimes I can decide on my own if they are justifiable or if I'm just being silly. Another thing that helps me is Valerian Root. But since you are pregnant, talk to your dr before taking it. Also, pregnancy hormones can play a factor in what you have described. As a mother of 3 children, I can relate. Don't focus on the negative, find positives to focus on. Make a list of your strengths, things you are good at, things you do well, and things you like about your husband. When you are feeling down, read that list.

    tempsingl3mom

    Answer by tempsingl3mom at 1:40 PM on May. 5, 2013

  • You really need to get counseling somehow. You don't have insurance? Some insurance plans cover counseling with a fairly reasonable copay. You need to get help for your anxiety. It is likely that your depression is linked to that anxiety because you are unable to do anything and feel helpless. There are ways to get affordable counseling and take care of this. You don't need to suffer in silence. You aren't doing yourself or your child any good.
    anime_mom619

    Answer by anime_mom619 at 1:45 PM on May. 5, 2013

  • You might not be happy staying home. I like the feeling of getting out and earning my own money. I can't stand sitting at home. If I had to sit through cartoons, messes, housecleaning all day, I'd probably feel the same way. You need a goal.... go back to school or get out and work.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 1:45 PM on May. 5, 2013

  • Another option might be EAP (employee assistance program) which has free counseling and often times that counseling extends to the spouse of the employee. Might be worth looking into.

    Try taking your child to the park and while he plays, chat with other moms that are there. Sometimes just actually hearing that you are not alone helps.
    tempsingl3mom

    Answer by tempsingl3mom at 2:01 PM on May. 5, 2013

  • You may have social anxiety, but I will tell you that telling yourself you do is reinforcing it and giving yourself an excuse. If you are not in therapy I would suggest that you get there soon. You my not click with the first person you try but give them a fair chance and if necessary change.
    It is not fair to him to be in a relationship that includes something (sex) and be denied most of the time. Frankly it is not fair to either of you. Until much later in life marriage and sex go hand in hand. Do you hate everything or is there something you do like? Have you talked to him about how it feels good here but not so much over there?
    Marriage is communication.

    Go to your mirror and look yourself in the eye. What is the one thing you want out of life right now? What is the one thing you would like to see in yourself five years from now?
    Tell yourself one good thing about yourself on the outside. (I have pretty eyes)
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 2:06 PM on May. 5, 2013

  • I think you are right ! he is the problem because you are not in love with the man otherwise making love would not be a hateful thing....aside from the fact that you have all sorts of emotional problems that need to be addressed by a professional. I am not an advocate for pharmaceuticals but they will ease your pain somewhat, but in the long run they will give you something else to worry about..try to get at the bottom of your feelings..and maybe this will make you understand yourself....

    older

    Answer by older at 2:09 PM on May. 5, 2013

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