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Keeping the relationship together when pregnant?

I'm 34wks pregnant with my second child and for the last month or so I haven't wanted my husband to touch or even be by me most of the time. This might be tmi but we haven't had sex for at least a month now and its not like I don't find him attractive but I just don't want anything, and every time I turn him down he starts asking if I don't like him anymore. I know that he feels like I don't want him. I guess my question would be has anyone else had this problem, and if so how can I explain to him that its not him?

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:53 AM on Feb. 17, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • You're tired...the last thing on your mind is sex. You're also chasing another child. My OBGYN said it's the "touch me"'ve been touched all day by your other child so when you get some time without someone in your personal space, you don't want to be touched anymore, regardless of who it is (I'm assuming you're a SAHM but I could be wrong). I totally understand and you're not alone. As far as your hubby, you can either explain it to him or just try to make an effort. It's also a bit of a turn off if you're tired and he's like "hey baby, wanna get a quickie?" Not saying that's what yours does.

    Answer by Jessy0419 at 11:57 AM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • I do try to make an effort but then he gets upset when he finishes and I don't. I do other things for him too but he much rather have the one on one bonding that sex brings.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:15 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • Duh, you are pregnant. Plain and simple. All kinds of things change when you are pregnant. He should understand that. I think all women go though times when they don't want to be near their husband/SO/BF, whatever. It's natural. I think men feel the same way sometimes. I think that's why some men turn to porn, but that's another post. You won't always feel this way. You are tired, and hormonal. He really should understand that, if he doesn't, get him to go with you to your next appt. and let the doc explain it to him.

    Answer by Buffie95 at 1:00 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • Have sex with him for purly selfish reasons. It makes labor quicker and easier when you have regular sex and it can induce you. So even if your not into it do it for those reasons. Or suck it up and do it cause you love your husband. Its common not to want to but come on. You can only expect a guy to be left hard up for so long.

    Answer by lstrickland at 2:31 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • Don't turn him down..Men kind of relate sex to do it because you want him happy and you love pleasing him. Also it DOES help start labor..I went a little early and we did it all the time.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:59 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • yeah well, I have it the other way. I haven't had sex my entire pregnancy ( I'm 9 months now).. It started out because he was scared. I had two previous miscarriages and then some problems with this pregnancy but after time went on, it wore on me that he wouldn't try anything.. so arguements started, closeness drifted, etc. I finally gave up at 8 mo. and realized what I could and couldn't change. Things have been getting better. We are starting to re-connect. Just give it time and realize that intimacy comes in different forms ( not just sex).

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:16 AM on Feb. 18, 2009

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