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4 Bumps

What should I do about my husband's addiction.

My husband is addicted to adderol. While on this he locks himself away and just watches porn 24/7. He did this on our wedding anniversary even! I try to stop him or take it away and he yells at me and threatens to divorce me if I don't give it back. The only time he shows me attention is when he wantd sex. I try telling him how much this hurts me and he says it's my fault for being so sensitive. But when he's not on adderol he's like worlds best husband. I don't know what to do he was my first everything and the father of my child and he's only a jerk when he takes the stuff.

Answer Question
 
clnhclnh

Asked by clnhclnh at 3:42 PM on May. 7, 2013 in Relationships

Level 2 (5 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • Next time you take it from him and he threatens divorce, keep it
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 3:47 PM on May. 7, 2013

  • Kick him out, and tell him you will not allow him in your life, or your son's, until he completes rehab. Stick to it. It may take a very long time, bc most addicts have to get to the point of losing everything before they will face their addiction.
    Nimue930

    Answer by Nimue930 at 3:57 PM on May. 7, 2013

  • You can not do any thing about his addiction. Only he can do that.
    You can take your child and leave.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 4:01 PM on May. 7, 2013

  • And he gets the adderol where? May sound harsh but I'd turn his butt into law enforcement. When he's on drugs he could be a danger to your child as well.
    baconbits

    Answer by baconbits at 4:02 PM on May. 7, 2013

  • I would give him an alternative: either he gets help to overcome his addictions or I'm leaving until he gets himself clean. I don't recommend divorce but I do believe that separations are sometimes necessary where there may be danger to oneself. If he agrees to get help, then I would stay around and support him in his efforts. But if he refuses, I would be getting out of there. You never know when he could turn really mean and that could be harmful for you and your child. In addition, I view looking at pornography the same way I do adultery--he is lusting after other women. I have never been willing to share my husband's affections with another woman--real, imaginary, pictured, on film or otherwise!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 4:22 PM on May. 7, 2013

  • Really? Why would you be concerned about losing this loser??
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 4:23 PM on May. 7, 2013

  • I try to stop him or take it away and he yells at me and threatens to divorce me if I don't give it back


    then do not give it back

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:29 PM on May. 7, 2013

  • You can't do a damn thing about your husband's addiction. The only thing you have control of is how you react to it. So far, he has nothing to lose by staying addicted. You may need to separate and take your child to a safe place, then tell him if he wants his family back, he has a choice to make--drugs or his wife and child.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 4:38 PM on May. 7, 2013

  • Treatment or else.

    Don't you have any standards for how you want to be treated? Do you think it's healthy for your kids to be in his care?
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 6:06 PM on May. 7, 2013

  • He is using the divorce thing as a control mechanism over you and your letting it work. Next time he says that keep it and see if he really divorces you odds are he wont. He has to take control of his addiction you cant do it. He is cheating on you and lusting after other women and yr okay with that. This is not a healthy or real relationship and If he was not willing to seek help then take yr child and leave. There is no judge in is right mind that would even allow him so much as visitation rights with him as sick as he is. And it is a sickness I just dont understand why women like you put up with bastards like him just for the lil bit of time they might be normal....It is baffling to me.
    Fairymom32

    Answer by Fairymom32 at 6:36 PM on May. 7, 2013

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