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What would you do?

So i get a call from my daughters freinds mom, and she says "Your daughter has been talking about my daughter and saying mean things" and i told her i'd talk to my dd about it. But the problem is I don't know what to say to her because i don't wan't her to be the mean girl and goes off and asks the girl why she told her mom. I'm in a tough spot, advice? what would you say or do?

 

BTW MY DAUGHTER IS 13

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:36 PM on May. 8, 2013 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I would stay out of it and the other mom should too, they need to sort this out themselves....
    older

    Answer by older at 5:42 PM on May. 8, 2013

  • Avoiding talking to her isn't going to fix the problem.

    Maybe start by asking her how she's getting along with this friend. Have there been any issues? Let the conversation go from there.

    anng.atlanta

    Answer by anng.atlanta at 4:44 PM on May. 8, 2013

  • Honestly, I would probably have everyone sit down together and get the story straight. Once I had a good idea of what transpired, I would try to help facilitate a solution that is worked out between the girls. If I found out my DD was being a mean girl I would ground her.
    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 4:45 PM on May. 8, 2013

  • How old is your daughter. That makes a big difference in how you talk to her about this
    Mrs_Prissy

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 4:38 PM on May. 8, 2013

  • Ask her exactly what she has been saying to this girl and why.
    I would also ground her. Take away her favorite things for a while and not hang out with friends.
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 4:45 PM on May. 8, 2013

  • Also tell her if you hear she is bullying again there will be hell to pay (just that sentence might scare her even if you don't have a plan)
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 4:47 PM on May. 8, 2013

  • I agree with getting the two girls together, then the whole story comes out for everybody to hear. If it comes out that your daughter has been bullying, I would recommend serious consequences, like taking away important privileges, so it doesn't happen again. But there are two sides to every story, so I'd want to be sure of the details first.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 5:22 PM on May. 8, 2013

  • I'd tell her that her behavior is unacceptable & embarrassing to herself & her family. Then I'd say if I hear that you went back to that poor girl & harassed her about telling her Mother what you did then there is going to be Holy Hell to pay.Follow through with some form of discipline like grounding or by taking something away.


    You know, my Parents never hit me or grounded me. But I feared them & conducted myself so as not to embarrass myself or my family. That is what I am instilling in my kids. You are the Mother, you should never fear talking to your children by worrying about the consequences later. If they do not respect you then they will not respect themselves or anyone else.


     

    ILovemyPaulie

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 5:32 PM on May. 8, 2013